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Book Series – Chapters I and II – DOES DIVORCE DISSOLVE MARRIAGE?

REVEREND MlLTON T.WELLS  (1901-1975)

EASTERN BIBLE  INSTITUTE

GREEN LANE,  PENNSYLVANIA

1957 – (Public Domain)

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FB profile 7xtjwNote by Standerinfamilycourt:    Rev. Wells was an Assemblies of God Pastor and served as President of the Eastern Bible Institute in Pennsylvania,  now known as the University of Valley Forge.

Our Lord Jesus Christ would have called his scholarly work, with its rigorous application of all the principles of hermeneutics to the scriptural texts on marriage “faithful”.

The author uses the term “Five-Word-School” for those who reject Christ’s teaching, centered around Luke 16:18 and other scripture, that the marriage covenant is dissolved only by the physical death of one of the spouses; those who instead prefer to center their view around Matthew 19:9 according to the Erasmean / Lutheran / Calvinist rendering, in such a way as to contrive a “biblical exception” (except-it-be-for-fornication) to justify remarriage after civil divorce.  

 

CHAPTER I  –  WHAT CONSTITUTES MARRIAGE?

The true definition of marriage is given by Christ in Matt. 19: 1-12 and Mark in 10: 1-12.  These passages will be discussed detailedly later in this book.   Christ based his ·definition of marrlage on the principles laid down “from the beginning”,  as described in Genesis 2: 21 -24. These principles did not permit polygamy “from the beginning.”  The man, of his own choice, was to “leave his father and mother”  and “cleave unto his wife” and the Scripture adds, “they shall be one flesh.” The taking of the wife was to be for life, for Christ said:  But   from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; and they twain shall be one flesh; so then they are no more twain; but one flesh.  What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder   (Mark 10:6,9).

The underscored words can leave no doubt that it was God’s intention from the beginning that man should have but one wife at a time, for the Scripture above states that the husband shall “cleave to his  wife” not to his wives.  Such a union of a man’s choice is a union which “God hath joined together”; as we shall see in the study of the harmony of Matt. 19:1 -12 and Mark 10: 1- 12.  Indeed it is not man but GOD who joins husband and wife together as one.  Neither the clergy­man nor the justice of the peace ties the knot. Marriage is not of civil political or human origin.  It was instituted by God in the Garden of Eden when God joined Adam and Eve as husband and wife.  God has not given any government the right to legislate any matrimonial laws contrary to His revelation.  Those who circum­vent the true laws of marriage by adopting the human laws of marriage will an­swer for it at the eternal judgment bar of God Almighty.  Any judge who dis­solves a marriage is dissolving it contrary to the law- of God and will himself answer before the ­true Judge of all men for his action.   Any minister who marries anyone to a divorcee who has a living mate will himself answer in eternity for participating in the sin of adultery for allegedly joining together those whom Christ has forbidden to be husband and wife.

Marriage is more than cohabitation between a male and female.   Christ’s statement in John 4: 17, 18 proves that fact, as do the many Scriptures of the Old Testament which affirm that an unlawful union of a single man with a single girl is fornication.   If,  however, one party to the unlawful union is married,  sin is called adultery.   The passage In John follows:

The [Samaritan] woman answered and said, I have no husband. Jesus said unto her, Thou hast well said, I have no husband.  For thou hast had five hus­bands; and he whom thou now has is not thy husband; in that saidst thou truly.

Some have supposed that physical union of itself constitutes marriage.   Christ’s above statement, “he whom thou now hast is not thy husband” makes it exceed­ingly clear that this is not so. It seems that she was a divorced and remarried woman because the men with whom she had earlier lived were called “husbands” by Christ.  It is unlikely that the five husbands died one after the other prior to her marrying the succeeding one. The spirit of the passage indicates that he was dealing with a dissolute woman who freely divorced one husband for another. The man with whom she now lived was not her husband despite the fact that she had married him.   Hollywood has many such women.   Indeed, marital union consummates marriage; however. the union is entered before that.   Adam took Eve to be his wife before he cohabited with her.  And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man,  And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh (Gen. 2:22,23a).    Note that Adam spoke of Eve as bone of his bone and flesh of his flesh (ONE FLESH) before he went in to her. This was true because her body was made of his body, her flesh of his flesh; and this was obviously before coitus.  In this light a woman becomes a man’s wife from the time  that he publicly takes her, law­fully before men and lawfully before God, to be such.  Any other view is both unscriptural and unacceptable to all serious thinking individuals, whether Chris­tian or non-Christian, To accept another view is to accept promiscuity, prostitution, and polygamy with all their polluting and degenerating customs, vile prac­tices, and evil consequences. No thinking parent would want his son or daughter to become a victim of such a society. The all-wise God provided that marriage should be socially and morally exalting by making it a life long union before God and man.

Other Scriptures show that both in the Old and New Testaments a betrothed woman was considered to be a man’s wife before marriage was consummated in coitus. See pages 61 through 62 for a more detailed discussion of this matter. The fact that a man who cohabited with a betrothed damsel (against her will) was put to death under Moses indicates that fleshly union did not of itself con­ stitute marriage; neither is there a suggestion in the Scripture (Deut, 22:25) that such a young woman was not still the wife of her husband despite her unfortunate and grievous experience,  In fact, the young man in question would not have been put to death had she been an unbetrothed damsel (Deut.22:28, 29).  Deut.22 :24 states that the man who commits fornication with a damsel that is be­trothed has “humbled his neighbor’s wife.”  Matthew’s Gospel confirms muchofthe above. Joseph was deeply distressed that Mary, the virgin, was with childbefore he cohabited with her. He would have “put her away priv!ly (Matt. I :19) had not the angel of the Lord appeared unto him and said, “Joseph ..fear not to take unto thee Mary thy wife; for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Ghost” (Matt. l :20).  Verse 24 adds, “Then Joseph being raised from sleep did as the angel of the Lord had bidden him,and took unto him his wife…There is no doubt, therefore, that a betrothed woman was known in a Biblical sense to be the wife of a man before he “knew her” in the intimacies of consummated marriage. Even in modem society a woman is known and recognized as a man’s wife immediately after the wedding ceremony before coitus.  In fact, should such a husband be killed on the same day before coitus. the wife would have legal rights to a wife’s share of his property. This is common to the laws of most Western nations.  A man or woman cannot expect to be (nor are they later) properly united when they take their vows of matrimony unless they expect to give to each other conjugal rights.

The Biblical idea of marriage provides for a stable home and the interests of the children of that home .It is not a mere human contract which may be scrapped whenever one or the other may choose.  Such a contract would permit divorce by withdrawal of either spouse from the contract upon dissatisfaction with the man­made union. The tiny sect of early Christians were in the midst of a society which practiced that kind of marriage. They were bold to teach and practice Christ’s teaching respecting marriage and, as a result, revolutionized marriage in the civilized world in subsequent generations. The early Church created a new conception of a monogamous lifelong marriage.  It insisted that such was God’s law and that its members conform to that belief. The fact that their be­lief and practice transformed society’s view and practice of marriage throughout the civilized world can only be accounted for by the fact that it came from the teaching of the divine  Lord,  It is not strange, therefore, that for many genera­tions most Christian churches have had within their marriage ceremony, at leastin substance, the following words:

I, B.,take thee C. .to be my wedded (wife)(husband), to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish till death   do  us part,  according to God “s holy ordinance; and thereto I plight thee my troth,

Unregenerated men of the day teach that when the partners cease to love one another, marriage may cease. Christ, to the contrary, taught that when sentimental love ceased to be felt, the marriage union continued. In fact, the Scrip­tures are plain; the union of a male and female is a real marriage whether or not”falling in love” was the origin of it.  Adam did not find his wife; God brought her to him.  Isaac had no opportunity to “fall in love” with Rebekah; she was chosen by Abraharn through Eliezer for his son.  Such arrangements were common in Bible times and are common today over a large part of the world. Indeed, love may exist apart from marriage and marriage apart from love.   Hollywood has debased and prostituted the meaning of love. They have given it a purely sensual and selfish meaning. The movie world suggests that when you become “fed up” with the girl you married, you may drop her, because you are  no longer gratified with her.  Sex is the center and circumference of marriage on the screen, and.unfortunately the screen in theater and home has set the stand­ards o f marriage for a very large segment of American society and has subtly in­filtrated the thinking and standards even of evangelicals.

There are three Greek words for love: eros , philia, and agape.  The first is centered in sex and sex atttaction. It seeks its lover for its own gratification and fulfillment.  The second, philia, is the word which best explains friendship. It means a mutual sharing of common interests, attrations and ideals.  Each lives for the other while the other is loyal and true.   It is based on reciprocity.  I love you for you fondly love me.”Let the fondness of either of the two cease and the philia ceases to carry through.   The last of the three words, has within it the spirit of altruism. and selflessness. The word describes the love of  God which is commended to mankind in spite of his sinfulness. adulteries, dishonesties, hates, bitternesses, infidelity, and unfaithfulness.  SeeRom.5:6-10.  Gods aid to Israel,

“I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with lovingkindness have I drawn thee” (Jer.31:3).

The last kind of love (agape) Christ expects to be existent in marriage. “Hus­ bands, love your wives.   Even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it” (Eph.5:25). This kind of love persists in showing itself to one who neither merits nor deserves it.   True, the love of eros and philia are not superseded by agape; they are enriched and dominated bythe latter which is God-like.  The spouse is loved for his or her own sake and for God’s sake.  Human standards of love are set aside for God’s.   Marriage in this sense of love as instituted at the beginning is lifelong and exclusive.  It Is indeed, in the sight of heaven, indis­soluble!

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CHAPTER II  –  BASIC RULES OF SCRIPTURAL INTERPRETATION WHICH ARE UNIVERSALLY ACCEPT BY EVANGELICAL CHURCHES OF THE PAST AND PRESENT

A.  Maxims and Principles of Interpretation Follow

Bernard Ramm presents the following in his text entitled,  Protestant Biblical Interpretation:

(Bernard Ramm:   Protestant Biblical Interpretation.   Boston, W. A. Wilde Company, 1950, pp.78-96)­

A  LIST OF GENERAL HERMENEUTICAL MAXIMS

( I) The Bible is to be interpreted in view of the fact that it is an        accommodation of divine truth to the human mind.

(2)  We must interpret the Bible with the realization that it is a progressive revelation becoming more clear as it nears the completion.

(3)   Our interpretations must keep a sound historical basis,  i.e. our inter­pretatlons must not create an historlcal blunder.

(4)  In our interpretation we must discover the meaning of a            passage, not attribute one to it a priori.   Happy is the man who can approach his Bible as free from predilections, prejudices, and biases as it is possible to do, humanly speaking. Too often the Bible is approached with stock­ in·trade or mere traditional interpretations.   But the task of the inter­preter is to determine the meaning of the Bible, not to verify his preju­dices.

(5)   Give preference  to  the clearest   and   most   evident   interpretation of a passage.   Frequently the interpreter is confronted with two equally probable interpretations as far as grammatical rules are concerned.  One is a strain upon our credulity. while the other makes good sense. We are to choose that one which makes the best sense and imposes the least strain on our credulity.

(6)  No statement should be interpreted as having  more  than one meaning unless unusually strong reasons warrant.   One of  the most persistent hermeneutlcal sins is to put two interpretations on one passage of Scripture breaking the force of the literal meaning and obscuring the Word of God.

(7)   Interpretation is one; application is many.

(8)  Interpret the Bible harmonistically. This Is based on the belief in the veracity of Scripture. Therefore, the Christian interpreter seeks to in­terpret the Bible free from all contradictions.  He will sympathetically endeavor to adjust all parts of the Bible to each other so there will be a consistent system.

(9)  Everything  essential in Scripture is clearly revealed,   This principle maintains that if a truth is an essential teaching of the Bible we need not scour the Bible to find it, nor will it be taught In one passing reference. ….The basic manner in which this principle is violated is as follows: a certain point of theological debate arises and its scriptural­ness is questioned.   The defender of the view then proceeds to find a verse or passage that has a verbal or perhaps even conceptual reference to his doctrine.   The defender proceeds to invest the verse or passage with the doctrine o r dogma he is defending.  Having found a peg on which  to  hang his doctrine. he considers it Scriptural.

We may consider something Scripturally proved when the very body of the concept is found in the Bible itself; not when we can find a peg to hang a doctrine upon.

( 10) All interpretations must be grounded in the original languages if they are to pass as accurate and factual interpretations.

(11) Ignorance as to the meaning  of some passages  must be admitted.

(12) Obscure passages mu:st give right of way to clear passages. There is the danger and temptation to invest a passage of very dubious meaning with far greater content than it will bear.

(13) Check all interpretations by referring them to secular studies,  a doc­trinal system, and the great efforts of the past.

(14) Finally, the Old Testament must be continuously searched for help in interpreting the New Testament

(Lewis Sperry Chafer: Systematic Theology, Vol. I. Dallas, Texas, Dallas Seminary Press, 1947. p 8);

Leading theologians of the day accept the following as a fundamental prin­ciple of interpretation:

Induction is distinctly the scriptural method of interpretation. Such in­ductions are imperfect when some but not all the texts bearing on a given subject are made the foundation of a doctrinal declaration.

The following principle is universally accepted by evangelical teachers:

The consensus of opinion of Bible Scholars is against founding a doctrine upon an isolated verse of Scripture when the preponderance of Scripture states otherwise.  No one should ever attempt to bring the general tenor of Scrip­ture to the terms of an isolated verse, but should rather call the isolated verse to the terms of the broader teaching of Scripture on a given subject.

B.  The Law of Witnesses is Plain.

In the mouth of two or three witnesses shall every word be established (IICor. 13:1).

C. The Treatment of Contexts Is Important.

  1. General Principles of Contexts and Their Abuses

It is also an accepted rule of true interpretation that every text should be understood in the light of its context or contexts. Every verse of Scripture or phrase of Scripture has both a limited context and a general context. The statements immediately before and after a given verse of Scripture which bear on the same subject are its limited context. The position that the text holds in reference to the book in which it is found is likewise important. The general context em­braces both the book in which the text is found and its relationship to the gen­eral tenor of Scripture found in THE BOOK, the Holy Scriptures,  as a whole.

Bernard Ramm has shown the importance of a context in this statement:

Just as a knowledge of each individual word falls to yield the meaning of a sentence and recourse must be made to grammar, so at times when all the grammatical data are known the sentence is still uninterpreted.  For example, the word nature has several major meanings in the English language as a con­sultation of any unabridged dictionary will reveal.  What the word means in any given sentence can only be determined by the context.  So the study of the context takes its place with the study of words and grammar as absolutely is very conscious of contexts.

It is striking that the contexts of Scriptures which support the Conservative School of Divorce are attacked by the FIVE WORD School to discredit their having any validity as a support for texts of Scripture which speak strongly for the Conserva­tive position of divorce.  Examples of the practice of the FIVE WORD School in this regard will follow later.

 

2. Context of Parallel Accounts in the Gospel

A full treatment of this subject will appear under the introduction to the har­mony of the two divorce accounts, Matt. 19: 1-12 and Mark 10:1-12.

D.  The Presumption of Establishing  a  Doctrine upon One Text is Revealed

There is a wide difference of opinion in the Church of Christ between the Ar­minian and Calvinistic schools of theology respecting the eternal security of the Christian believer, yet neither of these schools presumes to build their doctrine upon one text.  Neither do opposing schools, which differ widely respecting their views of the baptism of the Holy Spirit, pre-millenialism, the time of the rapture of the Church, and the doctrine of sanctification, presume to build their doctrine on one text.

Think of the presumption of either an individual or group that would seek to establish a doctrine of the absolute humanity of Christ. to the utter exclusion of his deity, on ONE text,   namely,   I Tim. 2:5:

For there is one God, and one mediator between God and men. the   man  Christ Jesus.

The statement of this text that Christ is a man must be modified in the light of a preponderance of Scriptures which show Him to be deity as well as man.

Think of the presumption of either an individual or group that would seek to establish a doctrine that human teachers are not needed in the Christian Church because of the statement of ONE text, namely, I John 2:27:

 But the anointing which ye have received of him abideth in you, and ye need not that any man teach  you: but as the same anointing teacheth you of all things and is truth, and is no lie, and even as it hath taught you, ye shall abide in him.

The statement of this text that a Christian needs no man to teach him must be modified in the light of a preponderance of Scriptures which show that God has appointed teachers for the Church to instruct others under the guidance of the Holy Spirit.

Think of the presumption of either an individual or group that would think to establish a doctrine of the final restitution of all wicked men on ONE text.name­ly,   I Cor.15:22:

For as in Adam all die, even so in Christ shall all be made alive.

There can be no doubt that this text teaches that all shall be made alive in Christ, but it is and must be modified and qualified by the preponderance of other Scriptures bearing on the subject which show that all men will not have eternal life, but only those who repent of sin and accept Jesus Christ as Saviour and Lord.

Think of the presumption of an individual or group that would seek to estab­lish the right of an innocent party to marry another after divorcing his spouse if he. or they, sought to build such a doctrine on ONE isolated text. namely, Matt. 19:9(A.V.):

And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another. committeth adultery: and whoso mar­rieth her which ls put away doth commit adultery.

Truly this text appears on the surface to support the assumption of the group of interpreters called the FIVE WORD School, but the preponderance of texts and passages of Scripture teach otherwise, as will be shown in this book.

FB profile 7xtjw  SIFC:  Did Jesus really say anything at all about an “exception clause” as apparently quoted (solely) in the book of Matthew?    Is there such a thing  — or was Erasmus and virtually the entire post-Reformation Church in serious, soul-endangering error?   Have literally millions gone to hell since the 16th  century for unrepented biblical adultery “sanctified” within the church walls?   To get to the truth, we need to dive into some hermeneutical principles, next installment, Chapter IV.

Back to Introduction

Continue to Chapters III and IV

Appendix

 

www.standerinfamilycourt.com

7 Times Around the Jericho Wall  |  Let’s Repeal No-Fault Divorce!

 

Book Series: Introduction – DOES DIVORCE DISSOLVE MARRIAGE?

REVEREND MlLTON T.WELLS  (1901-1975)

EASTERN BIBLE  INSTITUTE

GREEN LANE,  PENNSYLVANIA

1957 – (Public Domain)

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FB profile 7xtjwNote by Standerinfamilycourt:    Rev. Wells was an Assemblies of God Pastor and served as President of the Eastern Bible Institute in Pennsylvania,  now known as the University of Valley Forge.   His work would be considered “judgmental”, “legalistic” and “graceless” in many of the Assembly of God churches like the one SIFC belongs to today, and virtually any other evangelical Protestant church in America.

Our Lord Jesus Christ would have called his scholarly work, with its rigorous application of all the principles of hermeneutics to the scriptural texts on marriage “faithful”.    Until 1973,  so did all of Rev. Wells’ peers in the ministry.   Rev. Wells’ cautions in the Preface to this book, of course, went shamelessly unheeded by denominational leadership, and his words predicting the consequences proved prophetic.

The author uses the term “Five-Word-School” for those who reject Christ’s teaching, centered around Luke 16:18 and other scripture, that the marriage covenant is dissolved only by the physical death of one of the spouses; those who instead prefer to center their view around Matthew 19:9 according to the Erasmean / Lutheran / Calvinist rendering, in such a way as to contrive a “biblical exception” to justify remarriage after civil divorce.   It is interesting to read that even with the much-lower divorce rates of the 1950’s, the author even then refers to “a storm center of controversy among evangelical church leaders and other churchmen……especially over the past 3 decades.”   Some men of God will never take Christ’s “no” with a submissive spirit….as an undershepherd concerned primarily for souls above human esteem.

 

FOREWORD

We are living in perilous times. One of the most serious perils of our times is divorce, a danger which threatens the very foundation of our society; the mar­riage institution and the home.   One out of four American marriages breaks to pieces in a divorce court.  So many people are mixed up in their marriage rela­tions today that our social fabric is seriously  weakened.   Sensuality and promis­cuity are all too common in the American scene.   Hell and Hollywood contrib­ute freely of their vulgarity and sin.   These are indeed the days when men have “eyes full of adultery.”

Against this tide of evil the church stands as the only remaining bulwark. It  was reassuring. recently, to have a member of the British royal family stand firmly with her church against the temptation to marry a divorced man.  Certain churches in America also stand resolutely against marriage after divorce.  That  Holiness and Pentecostal churches be among those that resist this evil is properly consistent.  They refuse to countenance easy   divorce and remarriage  after di­vorce for any reason.

Such a position is Scriptural! “Whosoever shall put away his wife and marry another committeth adultery against her.”   Mark 10: 11. In his book, “Does Divorce Dissolve Marriage?” Reverend Milton T. Wells has presented this position in an able manner. He has done the church and its moral standard a real service in this complete and convincing document which he has prepared.  May it bring reassurance and strength to the church and Christians in general as they resist the pressure and help stem the tide of modern laxity and compromise.

Reverend Ralph M. Riggs

General Superintendent

The Assemblies of God

 

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PREFACE

 

The frightening increase of divorce in the past two decades is tragic. Even more tragic is the departure of some evangelical churches from the clear teaching of Christ respecting marriage and divorce.   Today, a large segment of the Christian Church accommodates the Scriptures  to the seeming necessities of di­vorcees.   This compromising practice has led to a vitiated doctrine of divorce with terrible and consequent results.  Indeed, divorcees and their mates need the sympathetic concern of every true pastor, but a church must not build doctrines of divorce to suit the practices of expediency and heart-felt sympathies, neither must such doctrines be adjusted to fit the Christian experiences of these  unfortu­nate lives. Christian experience cannot settle Christian doctrine; Biblical doc­trine alone must determine and qualify Christian experience and the practices and rules respecting the divorce problem within the Church.

God is regenerating the lives of spouses of divorce unions.  This fact however should be no excuse for the Church to alter her doctrine of divorce. To do so will increase the rate of divorce and remarriage both within and without the Church, and consequently will blight the lives of millions of innocent children now living and yet unborn. The blame for the dreadful increase of divorce is properly laid at the door of the compromising segments of the Christian Church.

The purpose of this book is to draw believers back to an objective study and exegesis of the Scriptures bearing on the doctrine of divorce, that they may see whether Christ did, indeed, teach the doctrine .of the indissolubility of marriage for any cause,

The further matter of the status of converted divorcees  within the Church is treated at considerable length in the Appendix.

The writer is deeply indebted to the following for their substantial help in the preparation of the manuscript:  Paul H. Chappeli. Esq., member of the Maryland Bar; Richard J. Crozier, S. T. M.; Hobart E. Grazier, B. A.; Nicholas Tavani, B.A. and R. E. Watson, B. E. D._, A. M., Ph. D.   It is doubtful that the writer could have completed such a comprehensive treatment of the subject except for the inspira­tion, encouragement, and practical assistance of these brethren, some of whom contributed brief sections which they have permitted the author to include in the text without identification of their authorship.   In addition,   other   anonymous friends generously assisted in preparing the manuscript copy.  A hearty “thank you” is extended to them.

The writer is also grateful for the kind permission of many publishers to quote and print portions of their publications, acknowledgements of which are con­tained in footnotes.

 

INTRODUCTION

Divorce with its attendant evils is one of the most serious blights upon modern society.  Recent statistics reveal that there are three times as many suicides among divorced persons as there are among married people and that more delin­quent children are found in homes broken by divorce than in homes broken by death.  Whenever God’s laws are broken, someone has to pay. Nations and churches are only as strong as their homes. God ordained the family to be the core and strength of the moral and spiritual welfare of mankind; therefore it is important that society know the teachings of the Holy Scriptures respecting di­vorce and remarriage.

All Bible-believing Christians will agree that Jesus did not permit divorce be­tween husband and wife, except in the case of fornication on the part of the one or the other.  The following scriptures leave no doubt about this matter:  Matt. 5:32, 19:9; Mark 10: 1-12, and Luke 16:18.

True evangelicals, however, do disagree as to whether or not the Scriptures teach that a chaste mate may BOTH “put away” his unchaste mate and marry another.  One group of believers, whom we shall call the FlVE WORD School of Divorce, insists that the Scriptures teach that a “chaste mate” may put away a mate who commits adultery or fornication and then marry another while the first mate is still living. The writer of this paper is of the Conservative School, which believes that the Scriptures teach that a “chaste mate” may be separated from an “unchaste mate” but MAY NOT remarry while that mate still lives.  The writer, at the close of this paper, will show that there may even be a grave  doubt as to whether Christ authorized one to DIVORCE an adulterous wife.

Numbers of churches, including some of the older denominations, which in the earlier years of their existence retained rigid views on divorce, going so far as to forbid the right of the so-called “Innocent party” of Matt.19:9 who divorces his “unchaste wife” because of fornication to remarry, have in later years  liberalized  their doctrine of divorce.  Is this a fulfillment of II Thess.2:3. “Let no man de­ceive you by any means: for that day [the day of the Lord] shall not come, except there come a falling away first ..and that man of sin be revealed the son of per­dition..?  Will our denomination follow the pattern of other apostatizing  churches?  God forbid!

Is the more liberal view of Matt. 19:9, and divorce as a whole, based on a bet­ter exegesis and exposition of the sacred Scriptures and is therefore more to be desired for the glory of God.  Should changing moral standards and mores of mod­ern times cause us to re-examine the Scriptures with a direct effort to seek for a more liberal interpretation of Scripture, as it touches upon the subject of divorce and remarriage, so that the Church may more..realistically “establish standards” in keeping with the more universally accepted moral tone of the timesl

It is true that students of either side of a given doctrine are prone to regard only that which will entrench them further in their previous convictions. It is, unfortunately, doubtful whether many students or readers of studies on either side of the interpretation of Matt;19:9 will alter the opinions with which they ap­proached the study of this subject.   It is my hope that the reading of this paper will accomplish two purposes: first, to clarify the thinking and convictions of those who are still uncertain as to which of the two views is correct; and second, to resolve the problem for those who, while they have accepted the conclusions and interpretations of the FIVE WORD School, still have deep misgivings because they know that strong segments of the Christian Church for centuries have held the conservative view of this question, and further, because they realize that a loophole for divorce and remarriage for the one cause of fornication will certain­ly lead to permission for divorce and remarriage for other causes.

The very fact that the doctrine of divorce has been one of the storm centers of controversy among evangelical church leaders and other churchmen for centuries, and more particularly in the last three decades, should impel him who ap­proaches this subject to come humbly with an honest heart and open mind, pre­pared to study diligently and painstakingly all the Scriptures in the Bible deal­ing with the subject.  No easy, snap judgments are in order here. Thorough thinking is needed. Obviously, the Conservative School and the FIVE WORD School of the divorce controversy cannot both be right. Let us, therefore, think prayerfully under God until by God’s grace we truly think God’s thoughts after Him in this great problem of the Christian Church. The Holy Spirit through the Apostle Paul has bidden us:

Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth (II Tim.2:15).

An old French writer made an observation in the nineteenth century which is far more true today.   He said that Democratic societies prefer books which may be easily procured, quickly read, and which require no learned researches to be understood …they must have what is unexpected and new.  Accustomed to the struggle, the crosses, and the monotony of practical life, they require  strong and rapid emotions, startling pas­sages, truths or errors brilliant enough to rouse them up and to plunge them at once as if by violence,   into the midst of the subject. I

A. W. Tozer: the editor of the Alliance Weekly, has said:

Our “vastly improved methods of communication” of which the short-sighted boast so loudly now enable a few men in strategic centers to feed into millions of minds alien thought stuff, ready-made and pre-diagnosed.  A little effortless assimilation of these borrowed ideas and the average man has done all the thinking he will or can do.  This subtle brain-washing goes on day after day ad year after year to the eternal injury of the populace — a populace, incidentally, which is willing to pay big money to have the job done, the reason being, I suppose , that it relieves them of the arduous and often frightening task of reaching independent decision for which they must take responsibility.

It is necessary that all who approach the study of this subject do so dispassion­ately, for admittedly there are scholarly and godly men on either side of this question who are deeply convinced that their position is the correct one.  May we come to the Scriptures in the study of this subject, by the help of God, without fixed prior prejudice or bias and without desire to wrest the Scriptures to suit them to the convenience of our denomination’s supposed need,  our seeming ne­cessities, our proclivities, or our carnal sympathies!  Alas, so often one’s expressed thought in a matter of diverse opinion is fathered by what suits his biased wish or apparent necessity rather than by an objective study of the facts in the case.  Most everyone sees the folly of this in others, but all are prone to do thesame thing. How desperately each one who studies this subject needs the illum­ination and direction of the Holy Spirit.  May God help each of us who approach­es the subject of divorce and remarriage to be free from this grave evil which has so many times blighted the Church of Christ. May this question not be set­tled by the traditions of great branches of the Protestant Church, no matter on which side of the question they may stand, for it is a fact that two of these, the  Church of England and the Presbyterian Church, have had equally eminent schol­ars championing opposite sides of the divorce problem under discussion. Surely it must be settled on the same sound principles of interpretation which have char­acterized the Christian Church for centuries in establishing the vital and essential doctrines of Holy Scriptures which have been virtually universally accepted by Bible-believing Christians for many generations.

The pastor who has dealt with earnest, believing divorcees, or their   mates, tempted to desire a doctrine of divorce which will enable him will be peculiarly to solve more expeditiously, at least, some of the complex problems of divorcees with the sympathy of his heart rather than with the conviction of his soul borne of a clear understanding of the teachings of the Holy Scriptures.   Many of these unfortunates have come into evangelical churches as a result of the easy divorces secured during World War II. They need Christ, He died for them. A pastor should not presume to give such people hasty and severe counsel lest they be pre­cipitated into worse moral pollution. God will guide them if they are encouraged to seek the Lord earnestly and study the Word of God diligently for light on their problems.

A pastor whose relatives have been blighted by divorce will find it difficult to be completely objective as he studies the Scriptures on this subject.   Obviously, a divorced person who is still unmarried will find it difficult also. Man’s depraved nature tends to press him to favor interpretations which make his way and the way of others easier and to favor such views of Scripture as shall not make him an exile and stranger (foreigner) (I Pet. 2: I I) to the spirit of his age (Rom. 12: 1.2V.) or church.  May all of us who pursue this study seek to be true Bereans, who search earnestly for the truth under the guidance of the Holy Spirit. May we seek the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth regarding this matter, cost what it may to us,  or to those nearest and dearest to us, or to any others for whom we have the deepest sympathy and compassion. The Bereans “were more noble than those in Thessalonica , in that they received the word with all readinessofmind, and searched the Scriptures daily, whether those things were so” (Acts 17:I I). Certainly the unfortunate divorcees need our sympathy, but we dare notbuild a doctrine of divorce on our sympathy and at the same time claim tobe honest with ourselves and the God of the Holy Scriptures.

Tangled problems of divorcees within the Church must be settled; however, they must not be settled by a prejudiced accommodation of the sacred Scriptures to them but by bringing them to the light of the truth gained by a straightforward and exact exegesis of the divorce texts of the Bible. Christ said,”Sanctify them through thy truth: thy word isTRUTH” (John 17:17).   All should heed the call of the STANDARD BEARER who during a fierce battle was bidden to return the flag to the retreating troops.   As he turned to press forward, he cried,   “BRING THETROOPS UP TO THE STANDARD,  I SHALL NOT BRING THE STANDARD DOWN TO THE TROOPS!”

May God help all who write on this subject, and all who diligently study it, to regard prayerfully the warning by V. H. Stanton: ..When once we have thought ourselves into a particular theory,  a conviction of its truth is apt to be bred in the mind, which is altogether beyond the evidence, while inconvenient facts are ignored…V. H.Stanton: The Expositor, Vol.Vll.

 

Continue to Chapters I  and  II  –  Does Divorce Dissolve Marriage?

 

www.standerinfamilycourt.com

7 Times Around the Jericho Wall |  Let’s Repeal No-Fault Divorce!

Rebuttal to ERLC: “IS DIVORCE EQUIVALENT TO HOMOSEXUALITY?”

by “standerinfamilycourt”

“standerinfamilycourt” responds to a blog dated September 24, 2014 by Dr. Russell D. Moore, President of the Ethics and Religious Liberty Commission of the Southern Baptist Convention (ERLC) safe_image (2)

“Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals nor thieves, nor the covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers, will inherit the kingdom of God.”     1 Corinthians 6:9-10

‘If anyone comes to Me, and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be My disciple.”  Luke 14:26

 

In the fall of 2014, Dr. Moore and the Southern Baptists, and separately, the Roman Catholic Church held conferences on the future of the traditional family and “inclusiveness” issues in the Church.    Following this, we started hearing a lot from the Catholics about how remarried divorced people should be made to  feel “better- included” in their church life.    It seems neither church was talking much about holiness, true repentance,  or pleasing the Lord.   The Catholics may need to watch who they seek to emulate, and retain their own saltiness, rather than seeking to stem the loss of divorced members, at all costs, to permissive Protestant churches.    Dr. Moore’s blog is from this conference time frame.

 

We shall start with the title to Dr. Moore’s blog, because the obfuscation of the biblical truth actually begins right there.   “Is Divorce Equivalent to Homosexuality?    The answer is “yes” and “no”.    In the first place, the manmade concept of legalized civil divorce has absolutely no meaning in God’s eyes.   Divorce’s impact in the Kingdom of God depends on its motivation.   If civilly divorcing the partner of one’s youth,  it is willful rebellion against God’s law.   If civilly divorcing someone in order to separate from an immoral subsequent union,  it is  a step in repentance, restitution and surrender to God’s law.   Either way, God is standing firmly in covenant with the original one-flesh union, which He exclusively and permanently  joined at the time of those holy vows.

BiblicalGroundsNot

We need to point out that Dr. Moore’s view is based on an explicit presumption that Jesus supported adultery as grounds for His disciples to both divorce and remarry, based on a phrase in Matthew 19:9.    Moore presumes no debate on this point, and because this view is so broadly accepted by the vast majority of the evangelical Protestant Church, he offers no biblical defense of it  in this piece.    We will therefore not lengthen our response by addressing something Moore did not argue, except to point out the significant conflict with the preponderance of other marriage scripture and church history.   All of the early church fathers of the Rome-based church up through the 4th century (Tertullian, Origen, Jerome, Eusebius, Justin Martyr, Basil, Augustine) as well as Paul, instead centered the adultery discussion around the exceptionless pronouncement of Jesus in Luke 16:18 strictly forbidding both, consistent also with the tone of Christ’s Sermon on the Mount which raised the moral bar for a wide swath of Jewish life-conduct.   Marriage revisionists, beginning with clerics in the Emperor Constantine’s court, later persisted in shifting the debate to instead focus on Matthew 19:9 in order to accommodate Constantine’s ongoing adultery / polygamy, and this trend carried forward beyond the Reformation.    Dr. Moore assumes that some of the subsequent unions Jesus said were adultery, are not sinful and not adultery based on this revisionist view.

Nevertheless, God uses the Hebrew word   שָׂנֵ֣א [sa-ne] in Malachi 2:16 for detesting and intense hatred of the “putting away”- the wrongful repudiation or abandonment – שַׁלַּ֗ח [shalach] , literally “sending away”, which He states is an act of violence against one’s family.    Notice that there is no mention in Malachi of  any civil piece of paper nor an allowance granted by Moses to divorce,  many centuries after the journey through the wilderness.    Contrary to the false direction of Luther, God never intended for adjudication of covenant marriage to be a permanent matter of civil government ( 1 Cor. 6:1).

All that said, civil divorce is an easily reversible one-time event that (in isolation) is not at all comparable to the two ongoing states of sin entailed in homosexuality or unrepented, continuing adultery via remarriage while an estranged covenant spouse is living.   Marriage revisionists have grown quite accustomed to arguing (straight-faced) that the first abomination automatically confers God’s permission for the far worse abomination of trampling His holy matrimony covenant and misrepresenting His very character to the watching world.    We all know that the pagans know a bit of scripture, too, and of late they’ve grown quite vocal in letting us all know they are watching.

So, let’s suggest a more forthright title to Dr. Moore’s blog:   “Is  Legalized, Unrepented  Adultery Equivalent to Homosexuality?”   Based on the two scriptures quoted above, we can respond to the honestly-restated question, which now reflects the main issue of consequence before the eyes of God, with a well-supported and unequivocal “Yes”.     Continuing, unrepented practice of both adultery and homosexuality are God-substitutes of equal degree: idols.   Consequently, as long as either of these relationships continue, they continue in idolatrous competition with any relationship or fellowship with God.   Neither is worse than the other, both must be repented in exactly the same way.   Neither can be cleansed in any way other than cessation and permanent severance.  

1 Corinthians 6:11 goes on to say:

“Such were some of you; but you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God.”     (An exchange was made, idolatry was laid down for genuine  fellowship with the Most High.)

Dr. Moore opens his piece as follows:

This week my denomination, through its executive committee, voted to “disfellowship” a congregation in California that has acted to affirm same-sex sexual relationships. This sad but necessary move is hardly surprising, since this network of churches shares a Christian sexual ethic with all orthodox Christians of every denomination for 2,000 years. One of the arguments made by some, though, is that this is hypocritical since so many ministers in our tradition marry people who have been previously divorced.

In fact, “SIFC’s”  own large, conservative evangelical denomination did likewise up until 1973 with any pastor who performed a wedding ceremony where either the bride or the groom had an estranged living spouse.    The reason for that is, quite simply, a holy reverence for God’s unconditional participation in the indissoluble marriage covenant, which the bible teaches is a supernatural 3-party entity that scripture also tells us is broken only by the physical death of one of the spouses. (Ephesians 5:29-32, Romans 7:2, and 1 Cor. 7:39).    Ministers in the evangelical tradition who perform vain marriage ceremonies over people who have been previously divorced civilly, (but still bound spiritually to their 3-party original covenant), are jeopardizing their salvation and aiming two souls, if not their own, towards hell.   They are also destroying the power and witness of their church, for He is a jealous God.   He is a God who is most especially jealous of His symbols and the image they cast, of which biblical marriage is paramount.

Dr. Moore arrives at an entirely different conclusion, one that demands physical repentance only of homosexuality (even if legalized), but gives full accommodation to the continuance of adultery if it has been legalized.   “Grace” he says, is owed to the adulterer, but not to the homosexual, unless (only) their immoral and idolatrous relationship is terminated.    Let’s address the misuse of the concept of grace momentarily, but first let’s gain a proper understanding of the marriage covenant, what breaks it, and God’s revealed character toward it.   Once this is correctly understood according to the word of God, all of the rest of the fallacies laid out by Dr. Moore have proper context.

Covenant is a very deliberate choice, and by God’s very nature, a permanent choice.  Throughout His three-year public ministry Jesus very deliberately walked around announcing to us that He is our Bridegroom, and that He will never leave or forsake us, that He was going to lay down His life for us, that He was going to be spiritually responsible for us, even allowing God to punish Him for our transgressions by allowing God to break fellowship with Him, His only Son, for those agonizing moments on the cross.    His first miracle was by no accident performed at that wedding in Cana when He turned water into wine – not just a beverage, but symbolic of His blood and of covenant, of the indwelling Holy Spirit Who cannot abide in a sinful vessel .   He told us that nobody can contain new wine in old Pharisaical (Deuteronomy 24) wineskins.   At His last meal on earth before going to the cross, He very deliberately recited nearly all the traditional vows of the Jewish betrothal ceremony in order to comfort His disciples and to institute Holy Communion.   When He spoke His Revelation to the Apostle John, He again spoke of His wedding supper, the consummation event.

Ephesians chapter 5 gives us a definite glimpse that the marriage of our youth goes far beyond the civil certificate, and would permanently exist even without it.   True marriage represents the oneness of the Godhead, also the relationship between Christ and the Church, whom He will never permanently send away and never replace.    To blasphemously suggest that God would break covenant, and betray a living covenant spouse to join into an adulterous union suggests that He would allow His Own holiness to be defiled, and His faithfulness to be miscast as unfaithfulness.    In Malachi 2, when God is fiercely defending the covenant wife of the offender’s youth by withholding His fellowship from the adulterer, He could have referred to Himself as “YHWH” or “Jehovah”, but He did not.   He called Himself Elohim Tsebaoth, the God of Angel Armies, the Lord of Hosts.    God is also  El Kannah, the Jealous God, and whenever He sets up a symbol, lacing it in and out of holy scripture from Genesis to Revelation, it is a very big deal!

Next, Dr. Moore continues…

We don’t necessarily affirm this [welcoming of divorced and remarried people into their congregations] as good, but we receive these people with mercy and grace……

Anyone who has attended an evangelical church for any length of time can define these terms, mercy and grace, by rote.   Mercy is not receiving the bad consequences that we’ve earned or that we deserve from God.   Grace is receiving unmerited favor from God due to Jesus going to the cross for forgiveness of our past sins committed by us before we surrendered control of our lives to Him, while accepting His completed work on the cross and renouncing our own efforts to keep the law.    Another way to describe grace is the empowerment that regeneration gives us to keep moving toward holiness, due to the infilling of the holy spirit, in response to His mercy.   It is the empowerment to make it to the finish line without sin hardening our hearts again and causing us to fall away, as warned of repeatedly in the book of Hebrews.    Grace is a divine attribute that cannot be bestowed man to man, but only extended by men where God extends it.   Forbearance, on the other hand, tends to become confused with “grace”.   It is the patience and forgiveness Christ commanded us to have toward one another when we’ve been offended in some way.    Grace is never cowardly and silent (nor affirming) acceptance of a sinful way of life in a person, which the word of God makes clear will cost that person their place in the kingdom of God.   That kind of “grace” is actually man’s license, and it is decidedly unloving, because it leads to hell without warning.   Naturally, these words are offensive to a denomination which has embraced “once saved, always saved”, but not surprisingly, this false doctrine seems to accompany heretical teachings about divorce and remarriage.   In these last days, we can only call these brothers and sisters in the Lord back to the words of Jesus Himself,  much of whose unpalatable truth Calvin, Luther and Knox summarily rejected.   Jesus warned:

Many false prophets will arise and will mislead many.  Because lawlessness is increased, most people’s love will grow cold.  But the one who endures to the end, he will be saved. “   Matthew 24:11-13

It is absolutely right for SBC congregations to welcome both adulterers and homosexuals into their congregations, but if they do, that local body is fully responsible for discipling them into the likeness of Christ, Who laid down His life and took up His cross.  Calvinist bodies, including the Southern Baptists, embrace the “once saved, always saved” mantra which is erroneous, in light of Peter’s instruction to “walk out your faith with fear and trembling”, and in light of Paul’s repeated warnings not to fall away, not to wander from the faith, and to finish the race.    The teaching that Christ died for present and future sins has no scriptural basis without active, ongoing mortification of those sins.   We are quite literally urged by Paul not to let sin reign in our mortal bodies.   By contrast, we are urged to confess and turn from our sins on an ongoing basis after salvation, and believers are repeatedly warned “do not be deceived” with regard to the controlling addiction of sexual sin, before being warned at least twice by Paul that this will cost them their inheritance in the kingdom of God.

 

The charge of hypocrisy is valid in some respects.   I’ve argued for years and repeatedly that Southern Baptists and other evangelicals are slow-motion sexual revolutionaries, embracing elements of the sexual revolution twenty or thirty years behind the rest of the culture. This is to our shame, and the divorce culture is the number-one indicator of this capitulation.

We would admonish that his is a much more perilous and urgent admission than Dr. Moore seems to grasp, in light of the rapidly escalating lawlessness of our times and the fully-evident meltdown of our society that resulted from outright licentiousness of the evangelical church in its unwillingness to call sin sin, and deal with it as Christ and Paul commanded.   The notion that it will take this cowering bride 20 or 30 years to embrace homosexuality in light of the persecution that is building at and within our borders is absurd.  We would further remind historically that the immoral compromise with God’s definition of marriage (Matt. 19:4-6) did not originate doctrinally for the Southern Baptists in the 1960’s but with Erasmus, Luther, Calvin and Knox in the 16th century.

It seems furthermore ridiculous to think that a church or denomination who wouldn’t risk offending congregants even for the sake of their souls over enforced societal normalization of adultery would suddenly develop an appetite and the discipline to weather persecution over enforced normalization of homosexuality as long as they cling to a belief of “once saved, always saved.”    After all, “grace” will cover it, and Jesus’ death paid for all present and future sins  – so insisting on physical repentance from remarriage adultery is “legalism”.

Legalism..huh

The preaching on divorce has been muted and hesitating all too often in our midst.

As we’ve just demonstrated, it’s a very good thing that it has been “muted” in many churches, for it has also been heretically distorted and false, when it does occur.   Better to have muted teaching than loud teaching that defies Luke 16:18 by claiming that an ongoing state of sin doesn’t persist in adulterous civil remarriages, or put forth blasphemous slander against the very character of God by denying His character revelation that He never breaks or abandons an original marriage covenant.   Better for such a  compromised pastor to remain silent in his deception than falsely claim from the pulpit that exiting immoral civil unions is “repeat sin” rather than the repentance and restitution it actually is.   Or to blaspheme that a Holy God would enter into “covenant” with adultery.   His position is very clear.   In Malachi 2, He says “I stand as a witness between you and the wife of your youth…she IS (not was) your partner, the companion of your marriage covenant.”   In Numbers 23:19, He says of Himself, “I am not a man that I should lie, nor a son of man that I should change My mind.  Do I speak, and not act?   Do I promise, and not fulfill?”

We love what Sam Crabtree, Executive Pastor of the Salem Baptist Church said  in the blog DesiringGod, April 9, 2014:
We are free to divorce when Jesus divorces the Church, which is never. (Even the divorce in Isaiah 50 is not a divorce from those he predestined, called, justified, and glorified, but rather a temporary action taken against ethnic Israel, who was never en masse the true bride in the first place.).    We are free to remarry when Jesus remarries a bride other than the elect bride, which is not as long as the spouse lives.”    AMEN!

Continuing with Dr. Moore….

Sometimes this is due to what the Bible calls “fear of man,” ministers and leaders afraid of angering divorced people (or their relatives) in power in congregations. Sometimes it’s due to the fact that divorce simply seems all too normal in this culture; it doesn’t shock us anymore.     Exactly, Dr. Moore!

The fear of man brings a snare,
But he who trusts in the Lord will be exalted.    Proverbs 29:25

Continuing…

…there are arguably some circumstances where divorce and remarriage are biblically permitted. Most evangelical Christians acknowledge that sexual immorality can dissolve a marital union, and that innocent party is then free to remarry (Matt. 5:32). The same is true, for most, for abandonment (1 Cor. 7:11-15). If the church did what we ought, our divorce rate would be astoundingly lowered, since vast numbers of divorces do not fit into these categories. Still, we acknowledge that the category of a remarried person after divorce does not, on its face, indicate sin.

Dr. Moore is here arguing with Jesus Himself when he makes his last fallacious assertion.   It matters not one whit what “most evangelical Christians” opine.   All that matters is what Jesus actually commanded.    One day, He’s going to ask, “Why do you call me Lord, Lord but do not do what I say?”

Luke 16:18:  18 Everyone who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery, and he who marries one who is divorced from a husband commits adultery.

Matthew 5:31-32:  31 “It was said, ‘Whoever sends his wife away, let him give her a certificate of divorce’; 32 but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the reason of unchastity, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

Jesus made this statement in the midst of His lengthy Sermon on the Mount, where He talked extensively about suffering for the kingdom of God, where He completely abrogated numerous points in the Pharisaical Mosaic law that embellished the Ten Commandments to the point of conflicting with them, and where He was unquestionably raising the moral bar, requiring forgiveness and reconciliation, and demanding that we keep our hearts clean and soft.   Against this backdrop, the street-speak version of what He said in this passage Matthew 5:32 is:

“You married a ‘Ho’ you say?   Too bad!   You [are] one-flesh with her and I’m also a party to that, until one of you ain’t no more .  So, if you kick her out and run, even if you get a piece of paper from the rabbi, you makin’ her a ‘Ho’ if she ain’t one already!”

Permission to divorce for adultery?   Don’t think so, dawg!    Permission to marry someone else?   Not unless you want a wife and a concubine, and not if you want Me to bless it!   I just got done telling you that if you say one unworthy word about her,  you are in danger of hell, and if you so much as reach for another woman, you’re at strong risk of wishing for all eternity you had cut off that hand first!

The Greek tense used here for  “commits adultery” is vitally important as well, but some scripture revisionists like to falsely assert, like Moore, that even if the marriage was sinful, it’s “still a marriage” or “the adultery is only a one-time act, covered by grace”.    If that were so, let me suggest that the One Who never spoke an idle word would have saved His breath for something important rather than repeat it twice!    Jesus used the present-indicative tense to refer to an ongoing state of adultery.   This is not a marriage in anything but the 2-party civil sense, and it doesn’t become one just because the parties are “sorry” but do not terminate the relationship.   The original marriage(s) still stand(s) undissolved!  There is a difference between being sorry for the evil consequences of transgression, and being sorry because fellowship with God is broken, leading in the latter situation to removal of the competing idol.   Adultery, and any form of idolatry always leads to a hard heart, which leads to enmity with God and, if not corrected, eternal separation from Him.    This is the reason John the Baptist told King Herod, an unbeliever civilly married to another unbeliever who remained the covenant wife of his brother, “it is not lawful for you to have her.”  (Matt. 14:4), and showing, as well, there is also no exception for spiritual condition.

Dealing now with the inexcusable misuse of 1 Cor. 7:15, this too comes courtesy of Paul in the midst of a passage that was teaching exactly the opposite of a “right” to divorce and remarry after abandonment.   For that very reason, remarriage is not even mentioned in this chapter.   In verses 10 and 11, Paul has stated that the Lord commands  the husband not to divorce his wife (no exceptions mentioned), and the wife not to separate from her husband, but if she does separate, to remain unmarried or be reconciled with her husband.   The chapter ends with verse 39 reiterating the reason:  the marriage bond δέδεται (dedetai) “deo” cannot be broken by anything but physical death.    It is no coincidence that Paul’s teaching taken in correct context correlates more so to Luke 16:18 than to any other gospel rendering.   Several church fathers’ writings, such as Tertullian, give extensive account of the two of them travelling and ministering together,  along with Paul’s mentorship of Luke as eyewitness to Christ’s teaching.

220px-Tertullian

Aside from the obvious context issue, 1 Cor. 7:15 has for centuries suffered significant Greek language translation abuse, with several of the words in that isolated verse, including the words “departs” and “bound”, that are best resolved by looking up Romans 7:2-3, 1 Cor. 7:15 and 1 Cor. 7:39 in a Greek interlinear text tool.    Upon doing this, it becomes clear that the word δεδούλωται (dedoulōtai) or “douloo” is not the word for marriage bond at all, but means “compelled to meet the absent spouse’s needs”, rather than follow Christ with single-minded focus.   Consistent with the rest of scripture, abandonment indeed does not break the indissoluble covenant marriage bond, either.

If the church “did what we ought”,  pastors would immediately cease performing weddings over anyone with an estranged living covenant spouse – no excuses.   That’s what the Assemblies of God did up to 1973, until unilateral divorce became the domineering blight on the land.   The immorality of the world system and culture should never drive doctrine or practice in the church!
With actual souls on the line, if the church “did what we ought”,  pastors would start telling their flock that the only biblical grounds for divorce is to undo falsely-sanctified, legalized adultery so that they can go reconcile with the spouse of their youth, as Hosea did with Gomer.  If the church “did what we ought”, false doctrine would be rewritten and seminary courses on marriage returned to a biblical basis based on full and faithful application of the laws of hermeneutics.   Yes, those actions would indeed cause the divorce rate (and, most likely,  lukewarm membership in the body of Christ) to precipitously drop , but more importantly, it would restore power and witness to the church which has been missing for centuries.   In the two scriptures Dr. Moore cites to claim a “biblical justification” for remarriage, Matthew 5:32 and 1 Cor. 7:15, the mere application of just one of the “5-C’s” of hermeneutics (Context) would immediately debunk his perennially popular, ear-tickling assertion.   See above.

From this point on, we’ve probably made our case where addressing the remaining presumptions in Dr. Moore’s blog becomes redundant, but now that we’ve laid the essential groundwork, we soldier on to a few more points.   We’ll ignore a few, too, because they are too irrelevant to bother addressing.

Continuing…

The second issue, though, is what repentance looks like in these cases. Take the worst-case scenario of an unbiblically divorced and remarried couple. Suppose this couple repents of their sin and ask to be received, or welcomed back, into the church. What does repentance look like for them? They have, in this scenario, committed an adulterous act (Matt. 5:32-33). Do they repent of this adultery by doing the same sinful action again, abandoning and divorcing one another?

How embarrassing it must be to these churches, who have “married” people into soul-endangering adultery, when with increasing frequency, the Lord mercifully brings full reconciliation between the original covenant spouses!   In my own church, a covenant couple who has been divorced for decades is in their 80’s and dating again, taking care of each other, and coming to church together for the first time over the past two years.    We published an amazing story a few weeks ago that made national news when a man, divorced for 43 years took an engagement ring into Wal-Mart and wooed back the wife of his youth!   It has been well-documented that there is a 60-80% failure rate for serial legalized adultery that builds in direct proportion to the number of adulterous civil-only marriages one undertakes, and indications seem to be that civil “marriage” entered into from adulterous cohabitation fails at a 97% rate.   Yet that doesn’t seem to stop the harlot church from demonizing the covenant spouse (who actually has God’s intense favor), nor from treating him or her like an interloper in many churches because they continue to wear their wedding rings, to  obey 1 Cor. 7:11 and to take a biblical stand for the restoration of their covenant relationship,  most importantly,  the errant spouse’s very soul  following adulterous remarriage.   God is jealous for His symbols, and for the soundness of the generations of their covenant family, and for their souls.   In many cases, God glorifies Himself in restoring two marriages as a result of such repentance, and He snatches 3 or 4 people from the fire in such cases!   Any bloodguilt from “breaking up [non-covenant] families”  falls right back on the false shepherds who ignored God’s word and abused their ordination by immorally joining one person to another’s spouse in direct conflict with Luke 16:18.

Given the scriptural fact that nothing breaks the marriage covenant short of physical death, there is no need to carve out a “worst case scenario” for hypothetical purposes, as Dr. Moore suggests.   God has laid down and clearly defined the seventh commandment.   Violation thereof is violation thereof, regardless of the circumstances.    Repentance looks exactly the same as for any other sin:  cessation and restitution.    Failure to repent leads to an ever-hardening heart, continued idolatry and continued broken fellowship with God.    The act of repentance is hard, so hard that the apostate church’s utter lack of remorse for their part in fostering serial adultery is shocking, to say the least!    But the understanding of how to repent is not hard at all.    As long as these pastors keep performing weddings over biblical adultery, this entire line of argument is incredibly shallow and disingenuous!   We would set up an entirely different “worst case scenario” and pose this hypothetical to Dr. Moore:   a civilly-married homosexual couple has been born again, and they realize they are living in sin, so they come to you asking how to repent.   They have “been together” for 15 years and have children,  two through depriving the covenant parent custody after a civil, unilateral divorce that God does not recognize, and the other child through renting somebody’s womb.   Are you going to tell them that breaking up that “family” is a “repeat sin”,  (so do they repent of this sodomy by doing the same sinful action again, abandoning and divorcing one another? )  The obvious answer for both scenarios is “only if they, and we as their church body, care about their eternal destinies. ”

 

In most cases, the church recognizes that they should acknowledge their past sin and resolve to be faithful from now on to one another. Why is this the case? It’s because their marriages may have been sinfully entered into, but they are, in fact, marriages.

In most cases?   In what case would the church not recognize their (and the organizational) past sin?     Furthermore, adultery, covetousness and discontent are hard habits to break, because if the baggage they brought with them was actually shed, the irreplaceable, supernatural one-flesh condition naturally draws a repented heart back to their covenant spouse, because that is always God’s will and way.    For all of the reasons already laid out above, we will agree that these are indeed 2-party civil marriages, for so says the piece of paper, but it is only in this sense they are “marriages” and adultery.   The very same could be said of legalized homosexual unions, however.    Neither will ever constitute holy matrimony in God’s eyes, but rather unrepented  adultery, exactly as Jesus said.    1 Corinthians 6:9 applies equally to these civil unions where God is not a covenant party, as it does to the practice of homosexuality.

Jesus redemptively exposed the sin of the Samaritan woman at the well by noting that the man she was living with was not her husband. “You have had five husbands, and the one you now have is not your husband” (Jn. 4:18). It could be that her husbands all died successively, but not necessarily.

Just like today, this woman most likely had quite a complicated mix of covenant husband, deceased partners, cohabitation and / or legalized adultery partners.    The fact remains that if the husband of her youth continued to live, all subsequent relationships were adulterous, and her present relationship was definitely adulterous.    If the husband of her youth was deceased, it’s possible a subsequent husband still living is now her estranged covenant husband.   We can’t speculate and there’s really no need to.   Again, looking at John 4:18 in the Greek interlinear tool, we find that one of the two words used here for “husband” is quite familiar –ἄνδρας (andros),  and ἀνήρ (aner) , either of which could also simply mean “man” or “companion”.   There is are numerous other Greek words for “husband” used in other New Testament passages, but not used here.  It is impossible to speculate from this passage which of her relationships beyond the first one constituted covenant marriage, and which were mere civil unions blessed by the rabbi under an outdated Mosaic “bill of divorcement” law that Jesus was about to abrogate. (See above).   Therefore, there is no more basis here for using this passage to support divorce and remarriage than there is in using Jacob, Elkanah,  Solomon or David’s experiences to support polygamy.    Jesus declared new rules as a result of the Sermon on the Mount.

Even if these marriages were entered into sinfully in the first place, they are in fact marriages because they signify the Christ/church bond of the one-flesh union (Eph. 5:22-31), embedded in God’s creation design of male and female together (Mk. 10:6-9).

As discussed above, God remains exclusively in the first covenant, rendering none of the above true of any attempt at remarriage,  except of remarriage solely following widowhood.   If civil marriages are entered into adulterously while the original covenant is unbroken by death, they can’t be marriage and adultery in God’s eyes at the same time, for that violates His holiness and misrepresents His faithfulness.   Jesus made it clear in Luke 16:18 that this is ongoing adultery not marriage.  The more-relevant scriptures, on which the Eph. 5 and Mark 10 scriptures cited by Moore actually depend, are:

Matthew 19: 4 -6 and 8:  And He answered and said, “Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? 6 So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.” ….He *said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses permitted you to divorce your wives; but from the beginning it has not been this way.

Mark 10: 6-9:  But from the beginning of creation, God made them male and female. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother, and the two shall become one flesh; so they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.”

Ephesians 5:31 echoes this, right after saying that any man who hates his covenant wife (obviously out of a hard heart, and due to the irreversible one-flesh connection exclusively  indwelt by God) hates himself,  hates his own body.   This is because a civil piece of paper cannot separate one-flesh or make it two again.   Physically and spiritually impossible, this is.   It is clear that what was established in God’s creation design per Genesis 2:24, to which Jesus was resetting the moral compass, is the husband and wife of youth being joined for life, and never again to be two separate people in God’s eyes.    God doesn’t issue “ideals” or “intents” with a Plan B- we are talking about the 7th commandment here.   This is the basis on which Jesus took the no-excuses hard line he did in Luke 16:18.

 

Same-sex relationships do not reflect that cosmic mystery, and thus by their very nature signify something other than the gospel. The question of what repentance looks like in this case is to flee immorality (1 Cor. 6:18), which means to cease such sexual activity in obedience to Christ (1 Cor. 6:11). A state, or church decree of these relationships as marital do not make them so.

All of what Moore has flatly stated about homosexual relationships applies in exactly the same fashion to the very relationships Jesus unambiguously described in Luke 16:18.   In fact,  those verses about fleeing immorality and honoring Him with our bodies were originally written to primarily address heterosexual sin including concubinage, false divorce, prostitution and polygamy.   Moore’s last statement is particularly salient with regard to remarriage adultery, in light of what Jesus said in Matthew 19:6 and 8.    Jesus made it crystal clear that man was never given authority to dissolve covenant marriage, nor to solemnize adulterous unions.

 

Instead, our response ought to be a vision of marriage defined by the gospel, embodied in local congregations. This means preaching with both truth and grace, with accountability for entering marriages and, by the discipline of the church, for keeping those vows. We don’t remedy our past sins by adding new ones.

So long as the definition of marriage is corrected to the  Matthew 19:6 scriptural basis, we couldn’t agree more.   However, once again, Moore’s last statement is particularly salient.   The SBC may legitimately lay claim to that declaration the moment they stop creating new cases of sanctified adultery through performing immoral weddings and counseling civil divorce on fabricated “biblical grounds”.

We conclude by returning to the (adjusted) question:  “Is  Legalized, Unrepented  Adultery Equivalent to Homosexuality?”

For purposes of restoring the church’s witness, restoring her power,  overcoming her enemies, for being pure and ready to meet her Bridegroom in the clouds, for withstanding the persecution of the last days, and for coming through the evaluation Jesus applies in Revelation 2 and 3, we say, yes indeed, they absolutely are equivalent.   Civil divorce, however,  is only equivalent to the extent that the root is equivalent to the fruit.

The attitude of evangelical churches in refusing to admit that remarriage after divorce is always biblically immoral has created an enormous obstacle over the past 40 years to driving any sort of godly family law reform that could rebalance constitutional protections between offending petitioners and non-offending, religiously objecting respondents.   The latter suffers oppressive religious discrimination in a myriad of circumstances as they are invariably punished, and made an example of,  by the courts for taking a biblical moral stand.   Pro-family, religious liberty legal ministries turn a deaf ear when embattled Christian spouses seek help in challenging the constitutionality of unilateral divorce, because these ministries don’t accept that it is morally unacceptable before God to remarry,  hence they don’t readily recognize the extent to which unilateral divorce laws burden a faithful believer’s free religious exercise and right-of-conscience.    Ideally, the government would not have any jurisdiction whatsoever over marriage, but the church would govern it righteously as Christ intended (1 Cor. 6 :1-2).    The government is an exceedingly unworthy steward of holy matrimony, and the harlot church no longer accepts her Christ-assigned accountability!

Additional resource:   Milton T. Wells, Does Divorce Dissolve Marriage  Eastern Bible Institute (1957), available through Flower Pentecostal Heritage Center, Springfield, MO   (archives@ag.org)

 

www.standerinfamilycourt.com

7 Times Around the Jericho Wall |  Let’s Repeal No-Fault Divorce!

 

 

 

All Saints Day / Reformation Day Reflections of a “Stander”

asherahpole2 by Standerinfamilycourt

Our family wasn’t big into celebration of Halloween, but in raising our kids, we tried to take them to the “harvest celebration” at our church.    The next day, November 1 would be a remembrance of the persecuted church, perhaps reading from Foxe’s Book of Christian Martyrs.     This year, it hardly seemed necessary to open that book because of being literally surrounded by modern-day martyrdom for the faith.   I reflected back on the day about a year ago when I met up with my estranged prodigal husband in a coffee shop to talk about a court hearing I was unable to attend earlier that day, and I mentioned the martyring of some 50 Korean believers when government officials paraded them into a packed stadium, tied them to posts and opened machine gun fire on them.    The remainder of 2013 brought nerve gas butchery in Syria, Boca Haram violence in Nigeria,  ISIS beheadings, sometimes of little children in front of their Christian parents, sometimes of Western aid workers or reporters, and posted on the internet.    It brought threatened hangings of pregnant women who would not renounce their Christian faith, and other atrocities.    We kept hearing that more followers of Christ were martyred last year than in the first several hundred years of the church.    People tend to be martyred when they stand against the authority of various “god substitutes” of the ruling class of the day.

Though nowhere near in this league, this past year brought personal persecution to bear on this stander too, as I told the family law judge from my perch on the witness stand that our 40-year covenant marriage, which His Honor was about to civilly dissolve to accommodate an adulterous relationship, was indissoluable in the eyes of the One Who truly held the sovereignty over it, and Who more importantly held the sovereignty over the soul of the deceived adulterer to whom I was permanently joined as one flesh.   I was brutally punished by the court for my stand  financially.    I had quoted the words of Jesus that condemned all remarriage of divorced persons as adultery, and got pretty much the same reaction in that courtroom as did my Savior on that long ago day among the gathered crowd.
I was shaking my spiritual, fist in Jesus’ name, at a black-robed high priest of the Sexual Revolution,  and such defiance of Baal was not to be tolerated!  I must be made an example of lest my defiance spread.

As this November 1 date stands for Reformation Day, it in effect marks the divorce of Protestant believers from the Catholic Church.  Quite rightfully, grace and the completed work of Jesus Christ on the cross replaced penance and salvation by works.    However, quite wrongfully, an unholy alliance between Martin Luther and the Catholic humanist Erasmus, influenced by King Henry VIII’s adultery-birthed Church of England,  replaced sound doctrine concerning the unconditional permanence of marriage with the new false doctrine of finding “biblical” grounds for divorce.    Anything to distance the new church from its Catholic roots!    Satan always has to make sure there’s a fissure in the foundation of any move of God!

The Catholic Church holds to the scriptural word of the Lord about divorce, but to allow for “permissible” remarriage, the RCC annuls the holy symbol of the relationship of Christ with His bride, the Church as though it never existed – the expunged bride of Christ, if you will.    This is honoring the letter of what Jesus said, but not the spirit.

The Protestant Church ignores those words of Jesus altogether and twists three or four scriptures out of context to create a contorted scenario of “permissible” divorce.   And she overlays that with a humanly extrapolated “permissible” remarriage basis with which the pastor can then “sanctify” a biblically adulterous union, entirely contrary to what Jesus said.    This is invariably accompanied by heavy reference to a tenet not emphasized in scripture, but also originating with the humanistic philosophy of Erasmus, that of “free will”, which is touched on in that 1 Corinthians 7  passage which he distorted in his rogue commentary.   This is then applied out of context by the evangelical remarriage apologists, while completely ignoring verses 11 and 39 of the very same chapter.  Thusly, we now have fabricated “biblical” grounds to divorce and remarry if “abandoned by a non-Christian spouse”.   What results is a deceitful rationalization to disobey God in a very central matter to the transformative power of the Church and to her ultimate ability to overcome persecution.    It is the compulsive need to update” denominational position statements as the prevailing popular culture changes, and to train its shepherds accordingly.

It is salt losing its savor.

Jesus told a very interesting parable that comes to mind as I reflect on this:

Parable of Two Sons – Matt. 21: 28-32

But what do you think? A man had two sons, and he came to the first and said, ‘Son, go work today in the vineyard.’  And he answered, ‘I will not’; but afterward he regretted it and went.  The man came to the second and said the same thing; and he answered, ‘I will, sir’; but he did not go.  Which of the two did the will of his father?” They *said, “The first.” Jesus *said to them, “Truly I say to you that the tax collectors and prostitutes will get into the kingdom of God before you.  For John came to you in the way of righteousness and you did not believe him; but the tax collectors and prostitutes did believe him; and you, seeing this, did not even feel remorse afterward so as to believe him.

The other two abused scriptures used to rationalize divorce in order to spiritually accommodate adulterous remarriage are the related scriptures,  Matthew 19:9 and Deuteronomy 24:1-4 (referred to in that Matthew 19 passage.)   Jesus was confronted by a group of Pharisees seeking to entrap and condemn Him by a spiritual controversy.   The  Holy Spirit moved three disciples, Matthew, Mark and Luke to write about the same incident.    Mark and Luke did so to a mixed-gender Gentile audience.    Matthew, on the other hand, is the only disciple / apostle to address an all-male Hebrew audience – men who invariably stoned adulterous wives and a culture that denied any such marriage rights to women.   Matthew was uniquely addressing an audience that included men who had remarried because they were now widowers.    The evangelical church would claim that adultery is the other “biblical exception” that permits sanctified remarriage.

How does one reconcile Matthew 19:9 which appears to contain an “exception clause”  to Luke 16:18, which is perfectly consistent with all the rest of scripture on marriage and divorce, and in which Jesus made it unmistakably plain that marrying a divorced person is adultery?    This disciple believes it is in recognizing that the Gentile cultures condoned divorce and did not stone adulterous spouses. With this in mind, the Gentile Dr. Luke realized his audience needed blunt clarity, instead of the tongue-in-cheek dryness with which Jesus relished delivering this truth to His original Pharisee audience!    The Pharisees, referring to Deuteronomy 24:3  asked Jesus, “why then did Moses command a husband to give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?”   Jesus redirected their twisted inference and their condemning question back to the eternal truth: “It was due to the hardness of your hearts that Moses permitted men to divorce their wife, but from the beginning it was not so!”   He had already asserted in Matthew 19: 4-6 God’s timeless and complete definition of marriage reflecting both complementarity of the genders and unconditional permanence.    The scripture says that this troubled his disciples who came to him afterward in private and said, “If this is the case between a man and his wife, it is better not to marry at all.”    Jesus had just kicked over an idolized Asherah pole, one that was dear to the church of that day!    Is it so different today?

And who was Asherah (or Ashtoreth)?   She was a pagan goddess who, like Baal, was of the heritage of cultures like the Hittites whom God drove out before Israel.    Different cultures in the region worshipped her variously as a consort of Yahweh, of Baal, of a god named Anu, and so forth – the embodiment of serial monogamy, if you will.   Babies, including Hebrew babies, were sacrificed to Baal, representing the abomination of abortion of our day, a culture of utter disrespect for life and personhood in God’s image.    Similarly, covenant marriages are commonly sacrificed to Asherah, consort of Baal, even in the evangelical church, as in Jesus’ day, reflecting a culture of utter disrespect for the very symbol of the Godhead, the Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

Every marriage to the spouse of our youth, until death separates, is an indissoluable  covenant union between husband, wife and Jesus Christ, the eternal Bridegroom.    Each such covenant marriage uniquely creates a sanctified one-flesh entity that cannot be dismembered except violently, damaging both spouses until divinely healed.    Asherah poles were also known as “high places”, phallic symbols in the cultures that worshipped her, and today’s divorce and adulterous remarriage culture, even within the church, is sexual idolatry.    It is a devastating impurity in Christ’s bride who is commanded to be without spot or blemish.    That “woman, Jezebel” whom Jesus refers to in Revelation 2, is in essence, Asherah.    The reference to killing her children in that passage is, in my view at least,  a prophetic reference to the widespread abortion of our day.

As history has shown us, both Catholic and Protestant purported followers of Christ have found various ways to cling to Asherah.    John the Baptist, and then Jesus, paid with their very lives.   Many of us have paid a heavy price for pointing this timeless truth out to secular and church authority.   Many an ordained shepherd has shrunk back from biblical truth because they feared men more than they feared God.    At least one evangelical denomination’s official position paper misrepresents God’s very character by falsely claiming that civil divorce removes Christ’s participation in that “old” covenant  and establishes a “new” covenant in a marriage that Christ in fact has called adulterous.

Am I condemning those who with clean hands and in good faith relied on the misguidance of their denomination and their pastor in remarrying a divorced believer?   No.   Unless, like me, a disciple was warned otherwise by the Holy Spirit yet unlike me, still chose in their heart to disobey, I believe God pours out grace in His sovereignty, temporally blessing that second marriage beyond what the statistics say about their marginal chances of success.    He alone knows hearts; who will be ultimately saved and what works we are called to in this life.   In the godly marriage ministry I’ve supported for many years, God sometimes removes a non-covenant spouse through death or subsequent civil divorce and restores a covenant marriage after decades of civil divorce that was never His will.
All that said, such non-covenant marriages will never be the equivalent of covenant marriages, either morally or spiritually, because they do not have the same underlying  foundation, and because Jesus, (without exception) called them adultery.    They look good temporally, but they still come at the cost of forfeiting the kingdom of God unless they are terminated and acknowledged before God as adultery.

I am saying that the church today is paying with a heavy yoke for disobediently going AWOL in first allowing marriage to be redefined in the 1970’s from God’s definition.    How long before denominational position papers are again “updated” to accommodate homosexual and polygamous “marriages”?   And how does the Church only partially repent?

Standers of every faith tradition, on the other hand are a holy remnant in these last days.   We are the Ezra’s of our day, fasting and praying to rebuild the church spotless again at great human cost, rebuild our ransacked marriages, and set an example that ultimately rebuilds the greatness of our nation under God, turning back His commenced and worsening judgment.    First and foremost, our stand is motivated by a deep burden for the priceless redemption of the soul of our one-flesh covenant partner in the fearful shadow of 1 Corinthians 6: 9-10 and Galatians 6:7.  We are unpopular, especially when we speak out.    When we do so in family law court, we are punished.   When we do so in church, too often we risk cherished friendships.    In our families, we as a group risk our reputations among family members where we tend to absorb blame and hostility  for bucking the anti-biblical norms of our culture, sometimes at the perceived cost of another family member’s “happiness” – we continue to wear the covenant symbol of its eternity,  our wedding ring, in defiance of the civil death certificate issued against our covenant marriage by an amoral county judge.

However, if because of this high emotional price we make the choice to fear man instead of continue to reverence God, we risk our holy anointing, our very saltiness.   FB profile 7xtjw

 

7  Times Around the Jericho Wall |  Let’s Repeal No-Fault Divorce!

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How Disgusting Is This ??

by Standerinfamilycourt

CallUs-Disgusting

You’ve heard of “ambulance chasers” ?   Well, how about distressed-marriage vultures ??

Apparently, it’s possible to cross state lines and shop for an easier, sleazier divorce in some states.   That’s actually how it used to be before the days of so-called “divorce reform” that wound up redefining marriage altogether.   This “reform” sunk all of American society to its lowest (or so we all thought) common denominator.

Some states, as far back as the 1800’s,  saw the opportunity for destruction of out-of-state families as a lucrative industry to exploit.     This attitude will likely have to be dealt with once again as more states re-assess the toxic impact on our society, re-thinking the social wreckage left by unilateral divorce, and looking to return to more family-friendly policies.

(Texas ad: “It’s a whole ‘nother rodeo out here.” )

The feared cross-state impact of repealing unilateral divorce is probably also one of the most formidable legislative and judicial obstacles  to restoring basic 1st and 14th Amendment Constitutional guarantees that were stripped from the politically disfavored and disenfranchised class of Americans called “Respondents”.

“Family Law” firms should not be allowed to reach across states lines to increase social malaise and instability for crass commercial purposes!   (It seems that such a practice qualifies as interstate commerce – and should be regulated as such at the Federal level. )

 

7 Times Around the Jericho Wall  |  Let’s Repeal No-Fault Divorce!

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Divorce — The Scandal of the Evangelical Conscience

by Dr. Albert Mohler, Southern Baptist Theological Seminary

Evangelical Christians are gravely concerned about the family, and this is good and necessary. But our credibility on the issue of marriage is significantly discounted…

[Downloadable PDF]Wedding Cake Pulverized

Mark A. Smith, who teaches political science at the University of Washington, pays close attention to what is now commonly called the “culture war” in America. Though the roots of this cultural conflict reach back to the 1960s, the deep divide over social and moral issues became almost impossible to deny during the late 1970s and ever since. It is now common wisdom to speak of “red” states and “blue” states and to expect familiar lines of division over questions such as abortion and homosexuality.

In the most general sense, the culture war refers to the struggle to determine laws and customs on a host of moral and political issues that separate Americans into two opposing camps, often presented as the religious right and the secular left. Though the truth is never so simple, the reality of the culture war is almost impossible to deny.

And yet, as Professor Smith surveyed the front lines of the culture war, he was surprised, not so much by the issues of hot debate and controversy, but by an issue that was obvious for its absence — divorce.

“From the standpoint of simple logic, divorce fits cleanly within the category of ‘family values’ and hence hypothetically could represent a driving force in the larger culture war,” he notes. “If ‘family values’ refers to ethics and behavior that affect, well, families, then divorce obviously should qualify. Indeed, divorce seems to carry a more direct connection to the daily realities of families than do the bellwether culture war issues of abortion and homosexuality.”

That logic is an indictment of evangelical failure and a monumental scandal of the evangelical conscience. When faced with this indictment, many evangelicals quickly point to the adoption of so-called “no fault” divorce laws in the 1970s. Yet, while those laws have been devastating to families (and especially to children), Smith makes a compelling case that evangelicals began their accommodation to divorce even before those laws took effect. No fault divorce laws simply reflected an acknowledgment of what had already taken place. As he explains, American evangelicals, along with other Christians, began to shift opinion on divorce when divorce became more common and when it hit close to home.

When the Christian right was organized in the 1970s and galvanized in the 1980s, the issues of abortion and homosexuality were front and center. Where was divorce? Smith documents the fact that groups such as the “pro-traditional family” Moral Majority led by the late Jerry Falwell generally failed even to mention divorce in their publications or platforms.

“During the 10 years of its existence, Falwell’s organization mobilized and lobbied on many political issues, including abortion, pornography, gay rights, school prayer, the Equal Rights Amendment, and sex education in schools,” he recalls. Where is divorce — a tragedy that affects far more families than the more “hot button” issues? “Divorce failed to achieve that exalted status, ranking so low on the group’s agenda that books on the Moral Majority do not even give the issue an entry in the index.”

But the real scandal is far deeper than missing listings in an index. The real scandal is the fact that evangelical Protestants divorce at rates at least as high as the rest of the public. Needless to say, this creates a significant credibility crisis when evangelicals then rise to speak in defense of marriage.

As for the question of divorce and public law, Smith traces a huge transition in the law and in the larger cultural context. In times past, he explains, both divorce and marriage were considered matters of intense public interest. But at some point, the culture was transformed, and divorce was reclassified as a purely private matter.

Tragically, the church largely followed the lead of its members and accepted what might be called the “privatization” of divorce. Churches simply allowed a secular culture to determine that divorce is no big deal, and that it is a purely private matter.

As Smith argues, the Bible is emphatic in condemning divorce. For this reason, you would expect to find evangelical Christians demanding the inclusion of divorce on a list of central concerns and aims. But this seldom happened. Evangelical Christians rightly demanded laws that would defend the sanctity of human life. Not so for marriage. Smith explains that the inclusion of divorce on the agenda of the Christian right would have risked a massive alienation of members. In summary, evangelicals allowed culture to trump Scripture.

An even greater tragedy is the collapse of church discipline within congregations. A perceived “zone of privacy” is simply assumed by most church members, and divorce is considered only a private concern.

Professor Smith is concerned with this question as a political scientist. Why did American evangelicals surrender so quickly as divorce gathered momentum in America? We must ask this same question with even greater urgency. How did divorce, so clearly identified as a grievous sin in the Bible, become so commonplace and accepted in our midst?

The sanctity of human life is a cause that demands our priority and sacrifice. The challenge represented by the possibility (or probability) of legalized same-sex marriage demands our attention and involvement, as well.

But divorce harms many more lives than will be touched by homosexual marriage. Children are left without fathers, wives without husbands, and homes are forever broken. Fathers are separated from their children, and marriage is irreparably undermined as divorce becomes routine and accepted. Divorce is not the unpardonable sin, but it is sin, and it is a sin that is condemned in no uncertain terms.

Evangelical Christians are gravely concerned about the family, and this is good and necessary. But our credibility on the issue of marriage is significantly discounted by our acceptance of divorce. To our shame, the culture war is not the only place that an honest confrontation with the divorce culture is missing.

Divorce is now the scandal of the evangelical conscience.

Could We Ever Get the “No-Fault” Genie Back Into the Bottle?

genie-bottleBy Standerinfamilycourt.com

This blogger has a new companion Facebook page Unilateral Divorce is Unconstitutional.   Like anyone advocating for an unpopular-but-just cause, I’m acquainted with many like-minded men and women who believe God created marriage only, and man / Satan created the dissolution of marriage, in utter rebellion against God.   Those of us who are “divorced” in men’s eyes from the husband or wife of our youth, are still very much married in God’s eyes, since He’s the party who will never exit a covenant union nor allow a non-covenant relationship to prosper.   Men and women who have been standing for years, are believing God for the restoration of their stolen and ruptured marriages.

Note:  standerinfamilycourt.com  recognizes that the remainder of this post may offend some Christians and others who are in subsequent civil marriages following a civil divorce, and may offend some pastors who have officiated these unions under the official but errant policy or position of their church body.    Our intent is not to offend or judge – the Protestant church has taught an unbiblical doctrine on this matter ever since the Reformation, which has gone mostly unchallenged.   As Jesus himself directly pointed out to an offended crowd, Judaism’s similar error goes all the way back to the days of Moses.   We apologize for the emotionally distressful impact of what we have to say, but not for speaking the truth of God that others need to hear for the good of society as a whole.    Our prayer is that individuals in that situation would hear from the Holy Spirit on this matter and that pastors whose practice is to officiate adulterous remarriages (where a covenant spouse is still living, born again or not, remarried or not) would repent before God for offending an unbreakable covenant to which the Lord of Hosts, the God of Angel Armies remains a party, regardless of any godless act of fallen human government.

One of the hopes for both this blog and for the facebook page is that our constitutional challenge case would develop a following and possibly even build to a class of Illinoisans with a direct common interest in the outcome of this case.   What if my prodigal suddenly repents in the middle of the proceedings?   God is in control, and is ardently pursuing him!   If there were multiple parties with legal “standing” to our constitutional challenge, the cause shouldn’t die or the case become moot if marriage reconciliation occurs for one family or another who come along as a party to the case.   There is no question that such an event must take priority over any other cause – wholeness in our families is just too irreplaceable and impacts too many generations to forgo for any public cause. Then, too, winning this battle in Illinois would only mean the same thing would need to happen in 49 other states plus the District of Columbia, since there’s no national fix to this national tragedy.  God needs to raise up many others with the gutsy resolve to walk the very expensive and emotionally-draining, lonely path He assigned to me in this state.

 

So I’ve been pondering why fellow standers seem mostly reticent to embrace the overthrow of unilateral divorce in the courts?   One possibility that occurred to me is the covenant husband or wife of their youth has entered into a non-covenant marriage with an adultery partner.   Is it possible that many standers fear that if the law changes, their spouse will not be able to exit that adulterous civil contract?

 

The husband of my youth is also under duress to marry the other woman now that he has obtained his “piece of paper”,  so I’ve definitely wrestled with this issue myself.   He’s being compelled to legalize his adultery with someone who has been divorced for some 30 years and who has grandkids just like we have grandkids from our 40 year covenant marriage.   Standers are spiritual warriors who have the audacity to pray that the 30 years of divorce will be bridged and that prodigal spouses in that other family will exit their adultery and allow God to restore their covenant marriage according to His will and way.   I recently shared on Unilateral Divorce is Unconstitutional a glorious story about God doing just that, restoring a marriage after 28 years of divorce!   – “The things which are impossible with men are possible with God.” Mark 10:27

 

This last nugget from the word of God is why I came to understand that I mustn’t fear that what’s good for the country as a whole might work out badly for my particular family, should the Lord remove the profuse thicket of (prayed-in) Hosea style thorn bushes currently restraining my prodigal from legalizing his adultery.   The spiritual battle of standing for restoration of a covenant marriage has always been about fighting on one’s knees, and this dilemma is just another aspect of the same.

 

We must understand that the falsehood we’ve been sold as “no fault” divorce is actually a one-way street that in reality amounts to unilateral divorce – the two are always mentioned interchangeably but are in no way the same.   My prayer is that the overthrow of this divorce mill regime will eliminate unilateral divorce, but preserve a true “no fault” option available by mutual petition only.   Where there’s no mutual petition, the party seeking the divorce will have to prove traditional fault.   Yes, this will likely make it harder, slower and costlier than it is today to get out of some non-covenant marriages, but there are several possibilities for the God of all creation to move and overcome such circumstances:

(1) there may be some kind of substantial abusive behavior in a home built on such a shabby foundation which included premarital adultery, such that there would be provable cause-based grounds

(2) God will reignite the eros, phileo and agape between the adultery partner and their own covenant spouse, in response to our prayers for their family, such that there develops a mutual “no-fault” agreement to exit the non-covenant marriage

(3) since repeal of unilateral divorce would be a slow state-by-state process, the Lord might move the non-covenants to another state where unilateral divorce is still available

(4) in His sovereignty, God removes the life of an interloping non-covenant partner. (God spells divorce “D-E-A-T-H”.)

 

Even in the natural, the outlook for an adulterous remarriage, or any second or subsequent marriage for that matter, is not so good.  If a 40 year lifetime of shared pursuits and experiences can be so easily discarded, what’s the prognosis for a so-called “significant other” who wasn’t quite significant enough not to be lied to, hidden from family and cheated on over a period of years?   How much trust, security and confidence could there be in a relationship that was birthed in selfishness, theft and treachery?

 

“Everyone who hears these words of Mine and does not act on them, will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand. The rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and slammed against that house; and it fell—and great was its fall.”   Matthew 7:26-27

 

God has been working in me uniquely and individually to believe Him in all circumstances that there’s no way He will promise and not fulfill (Numbers 23:19), even at the most hopeless points in the journey – when I’ve been losing in court, and treated as the wrongdoer by the human judge, slandered in a shrill chorus by both that judge and opposing counsel.   And when to my dread, I can’t avoid enraging the man I love and escalating the conflict with every new development in this long contest of spiritual wills.   God still leads me beside the still waters as promised, and will prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies (abundant vindication), in His timing and His orchestration.

It took time and much grief to get the nation into this messy situation in the first place.  Purging this evil from our society is also going to be messy, but before a holy God, we really have no choice.    He will pour out sufficient grace to get us all through it, glorifying Himself beyond all we could ask or imagine.   He is able.

7 Times Around the Jericho Wall | Let’s Repeal No-Fault Divorce

www.standerinfamilycourt.com

 


 

 

Illinois HB1452: Family-Toxic Law Stealthily Seeking to Become Vastly More So!

 

Heads up, Illinois!             You will not read a word about this in the liberal mainstream media, and (sadly) neither will you hear about this even from the pro-family organizations of this state, nor the alternative Christian media.    The impact on your family, and your children’s families will be devastating if this bill is allowed to quietly pass into law this fall,  as predicted by the Illinois State Bar Association,  after the legislature reconvenes October 1.

I surely don’t mean to “diss” the hardworking, diligent family champions such as the Illinois Family Institute, who work absolutely tirelessly “as unto the Lord” to hold back much toxic social-engineering legislation each year with a limited budget, not to mention having to deal with the less-than-biblical sensibilities of some of their larger donors who rather prefer the current system of church-blessed serial monogamy (based on “biblical grounds”, of course! )  To their huge credit, IFI was instrumental in 2013 in rallying the faithful of this state from south to north, east to west to nearly stop a well-funded freight train of media and big-government support for (further) redefining marriage in Illinois.   Theirs was unquestionably one of the best-organized efforts I’ve ever observed, and their events were, every one of them, purely to God’s glory!    I’ve corresponded more than once with IFI’s leadership about HB1452 and they were cordial and gracious, assuring me they were working diligently behind the scenes in Springfield, but it “wasn’t  time yet” to inform the public about a bill that is taking deadly aim against the persistent remnants of the traditional family in this state, and which hardly anyone in the general public is even aware of.

Despite IFI’s off-the-record assurances, this bill passed in the state house and was referred to the state senate as the 2014 spring session wound down.   An appalling number of conservatives voted for it in the total absence of any public pressure or visibility.   (My state rep was absent that day.)

So with no media or family advocacy coverage, and no mention whatsoever by my own state rep (a conservative), how did I ever find out about this legislation?   I was sitting in the cafeteria of our county judicial center just about a year ago, having lunch with my attorney during a break from defending against the civil charge of “irreconcilable differences” brought by my husband of nearly 40 years against me and our suddenly “irretrievable” marriage.    Despite being assigned a very biased judge, we were having some limited early success in bringing admissible evidence against each of the 4 or 5 points the current law uses to define “irreconcilable differences”.    Mr. W looked at me and told me, “Mrs. V, you know that’s all about to change”.    He went on to explain that the 2 year required separation period was about to be reduced to 6 months, and there would no longer be any space allowed in the law to bring a defense against allegations of “irreconcilable differences”.

Respondent Meme

Even the rankest criminal has the constitutional right in our country to bring evidence to defend himself or herself, and (by extension) defend the integrity of his or her family, but not so for those who stand in the way of unfettered narcissism and sexual anarchy.    To be fair, Illinois was in the tiniest minority of states in seeking to give families space to reconcile – this law will simply imitate the vast majority of other states who already crush familes and subjegate the parental, conscience and property rights of non-offending spouses with lightning speed.    Up to now, Illinois also boasted of a substantially lower divorce rate than most states, as high as it is, but that’s about to radically change, too.

It’s important to understand that very much like the original wave of unilateral (“no-fault”) divorce legislation 40 or so years ago, there is and was no public outcry or broad demand for it.    It was simply foisted unsought on the public by a consortium of feminists and the legal profession,  including some with substantial personal conflicts of interest.   My imminent divorce appeal gave me reason today to try and find out which organizations or special interest groups are actually backing this bill.   I called the office of the sponsor, Rep. Kelly Burke to inquire, and was told it was supported by only one backing organization,  the Children’s Rights Council.    Rep. Burke’s staffer then volunteered, “DHS, the ACLU and the Illinois State Bar Association hold no position”.   REALLY?     Actually, aside from the marriage-assassination provisions, there is a lot in the bill related to child welfare (if you can call massive government intrusion into parental rights without the slightest proof of fault “welfare”), hence the lone backer.

I can only conclude that the media collusion / censorship that affords this bill its stealth makes it unnecessary for various bar groups with a substantial vested economic interest to risk showing their colors to the public.   No opposition is expected or planned for.   They do not expect you to call your state senator and urge them to oppose this bill.    By design, they do not expect you and I, their constituents, to even know about it.   They don’t fear any meaningful opposition from the usual champions of the traditional family whom they know aren’t willing to publicly clean up their own heterosexual house first before protesting in front of someone else’s homosexual abode.    As my religious freedom / constitutional attorney recently put it, “it’s not a very sexy fund-raising cause”.   Sometimes the very best of us forget that nevertheless God is watching and grieving.     Could it be that this is a reason He’s not giving us more traction against the tsunami of homofacism that is steadily stealing our religious liberty, and (ultimately) our democracy?

Those who don’t like to read long blogs can probably jump off now, but for the inquisitive (and patient), I’d like to share and comment on a few of the points and attitudes in the draft legislation.   You are entitled to know whether your legislators are actually representing you well.

13 (750 ILCS 5/102) (from Ch. 40, par. 102)
14 Sec. 102. Purposes; Rules of Construction. This Act shall
15 be liberally construed and applied to promote its underlying
16 purposes, which are to:
17 (1) provide adequate procedures for the solemnization and
18 registration of marriage;
19 (2) strengthen and preserve the integrity of marriage and
20   safeguard family relationships; 
21 (3) promote the amicable settlement of disputes that have
22   arisen between parties to a marriage;
23   (4) mitigate the potential harm to the spouses and their
24   children caused by the process of an action brought under this
HB1452 Engrossed – 15 – LRB098 02948 HEP 32963 b
1 Act, and protect children from exposure to conflict and
2 violence legal dissolution of marriage;
3 (5) ensure predictable decision-making for the care of
4 children and for the allocation of parenting time and other
5 parental responsibilities, and avoid prolonged uncertainty by
6 expeditiously resolving issues involving children;
7 (6) recognize the right of children to a healthy
8   relationship with parents, and the responsibility of parents to
9   ensure such a relationship;
10 (7) acknowledge that the determination of children's best
11   interests, and the allocation of parenting time and significant
12   decision-making responsibilities, are among the paramount
13   responsibilities of our system of justice, and to that end:
14 (A) recognize children's right to a strong and healthy
15 relationship with parents, and parents' concomitant right
16 and responsibility to create and maintain such
17 relationships;
18 (B) recognize that, in the absence of domestic violence
19 or any other factor that the court expressly finds to be
20 relevant, proximity to, and frequent contact with, both
21 parents promotes healthy development of children;
22 (C) facilitate parental planning and agreement about
23 the children's upbringing and allocation of parenting time
24 and other parental responsibilities;
25 (D) continue existing parent-child relationships, and
26   secure the maximum involvement and cooperation of parents
HB1452 Engrossed – 16 – LRB098 02948 HEP 32963 b
1 regarding the physical, mental, moral, and emotional
2   well-being of the children during and after the litigation;
3 and
4 (E) promote or order parents to participate in programs
5 designed to educate parents to:
6 (i) minimize or eliminate rancor and the
7   detrimental effect of litigation in any proceeding
8   involving children; and
9 (ii) facilitate the maximum cooperation of parents
10 in raising their children;
11 (8) (5) make reasonable provision for support spouses and
12 minor children during and after an underlying dissolution of
13 marriage, parentage, or parental responsibility allocation
14 action litigation, including provision for timely advances
15 awards of interim fees and costs to all attorneys, experts, and
16 opinion witnesses including guardians ad litem and children's
17 representatives, to achieve substantial parity in parties'
18 access to funds for pre-judgment litigation costs in an action
19 for dissolution of marriage;
20 (9) (6) eliminate the consideration of marital misconduct
21 in the adjudication of rights and duties incident to the legal
22 dissolution of marriage, legal separation and declaration of
23 invalidity of marriage; and
24 (7) secure the maximum involvement and cooperation of both
25 parents regarding the physical, mental, moral and emotional
26 well-being of the children during and after the litigation; and
HB1452 Engrossed – 17 – LRB098 02948 HEP 32963 b
1 (10) (8) make provision for the preservation and
2 conservation of marital assets during the litigation.
3 (Source: P.A. 89-712, eff. 6-1-97.)

 

In the above excerpt, I took the liberty of bolding the lofty aims of those-who-know-far-better-than-us.    When a law is being judged for its constitutionality which intrudes on fundamental rights, the following questions are supposed to be asked:

(1) is the law absolutely necessary to achieve the stated objective?   (2) does it actually achieve the stated objective?                                            (3) is there a less intrusive way to achieve the stated objective?

All of these questions seem laughable at best in the context of forced divorce-on-demand.

I also italicized the portions that to me flaunt the arrogance of  these sponsoring legislators, as if the existing law wasn’t presumptuous enough!     Marriage (and the moral right to stay married,  absent a pattern of destructive behavior toward the marriage) is a fundamental right.    That right is given by God, not government.  Intrusion by the government into the life of the family in the absence of proven wrongdoing, at the sole request of the offending spouse and over the objection of the non-offending spouse, in order to supervise the conduct of the family is beyond arrogant – it’s heinous and unconscionable!   I find it hideous that these smug legislators then consider us and not themselves to be the very source of the problem!     The disgusting result, all too often, is that the “improvement” the court has engineered turns out to be exposure of the children to an immoral cohabiting relationship with a boyfriend or girlfriend who then abuses the children while their non-offending, non-custodial parent , thanks to the legislative wisdom of disregarding marital misconduct, is left helpless to do anything about it.    That offends God:

“In body and spirit you are his.    And what does he want?  Godly children from your union.”    Malachi 2:15 

Sec. 401. Dissolution of marriage.
5 (a) The court shall enter a judgment of dissolution of
6 marriage when if at the time the action was commenced one of
7 the spouses was a resident of this State or was stationed in
8 this State while a member of the armed services, and the
9 residence or military presence had been maintained for 90 days
10 next preceding the commencement of the action or the making of
11 the finding:
12 Irreconcilable differences have caused the irretrievable
13 breakdown of the marriage and the court determines that efforts
14   at reconciliation have failed or that future attempts at
15   reconciliation would be impracticable and not in the best
16   interests of the family.
17 (a-5) If the parties are separated for 6 consecutive
18 months, which period may commence prior to or after the filing
19 of an action for dissolution of marriage under this Act, there
20   will be an irrebuttable presumption that the requirement of
21   irreconcilable differences has been met. ; provided, however,
22 that a finding of residence of a party in any judgment entered
23 under this Act from January 1, 1982 through June 30, 1982 shall
24 satisfy the former domicile requirements of this Act; and if
25 one of the following grounds for dissolution has been proved:
HB1452 Engrossed – 23 – LRB098 02948 HEP 32963 b
1 (1) That, without cause or provocation by the
2 petitioner: the respondent was at the time of such
3 marriage, and continues to be naturally impotent; the
4 respondent had a wife or husband living at the time of the
5 marriage; the respondent had committed adultery subsequent
6 to the marriage; the respondent has wilfully deserted or
7 absented himself or herself from the petitioner for the
8 space of one year, including any period during which
9 litigation may have pended between the spouses for
10 dissolution of marriage or legal separation; the
11 respondent has been guilty of habitual drunkenness for the
12 space of 2 years; the respondent has been guilty of gross
13 and confirmed habits caused by the excessive use of
14 addictive drugs for the space of 2 years, or has attempted
15 the life of the other by poison or other means showing
16 malice, or has been guilty of extreme and repeated physical
17 or mental cruelty, or has been convicted of a felony or
18 other infamous crime; or the respondent has infected the
19 other with a sexually transmitted disease. "Excessive use
20 of addictive drugs", as used in this Section, refers to use
21 of an addictive drug by a person when using the drug
22 becomes a controlling or a dominant purpose of his life; or
23 (2) That the spouses have lived separate and apart for
24 a continuous period in excess of 2 years and irreconcilable
25 differences have caused the irretrievable breakdown of the
26 marriage and the court determines that efforts at
HB1452 Engrossed – 24 – LRB098 02948 HEP 32963 b
1 reconciliation have failed or that future attempts at
2 reconciliation would be impracticable and not in the best
3 interests of the family. If the spouses have lived separate
4 and apart for a continuous period of not less than 6 months
5 next preceding the entry of the judgment dissolving the
6 marriage, as evidenced by testimony or affidavits of the
7 spouses, the requirement of living separate and apart for a
8 continuous period in excess of 2 years may be waived upon
9 written stipulation of both spouses filed with the court.
10 At any time after the parties cease to cohabit, the
11 following periods shall be included in the period of
12 separation:
13 (A) any period of cohabitation during which the
14 parties attempted in good faith to reconcile and
15 participated in marriage counseling under the guidance
16 of any of the following: a psychiatrist, a clinical
17 psychologist, a clinical social worker, a marriage and
18 family therapist, a person authorized to provide
19 counseling in accordance with the prescriptions of any
20 religious denomination, or a person regularly engaged
21 in providing family or marriage counseling; and
22 (B) any period of cohabitation under written
23 agreement of the parties to attempt to reconcile.
24 In computing the period during which the spouses have lived
25 separate and apart for purposes of this Section, periods during
26 which the spouses were living separate and apart prior to July
HB1452 Engrossed – 25 – LRB098 02948 HEP 32963 b
1 1, 1984 are included.

 

The vast sea of stricken language above is the removal of any option or requirement to prove fault, or have fault proven as a condition of goverment intrusion into marital privacy and the  conduct of the family.    The italicized arrogance is that the court [ i.e. government intrusion] will determine whether or not reconciliation attempts have failed, and whether reconciliation is in the best interest of the family.   In reality, God decided both of these issues a very long time ago but government here seeks to put itself in the place of God.

Many who are blessed with healthy marriages may be reading this and wondering if the fight against government interference with the family is worth the energy.   I say it is if you are a taxpayer who ever held out a hope that state and federal governments would one day be able to balance their budgets again.    I submit that divorce-on-demand is a key reason why this will never be the case again unless unilateral divorce is repealed or overturned nationwide.    Pastors in the inner city minority communities have watched poverty grow as family law disintegrated into the moral abyss.    Part of it is consequential and part is God’s judment as promised.

Look, I am sending you the prophet Elijah before the great and dreadful day of the Lord arrives.   His preaching will turn the hearts of fathers to their children, and the hearts of children to their fathers.  Otherwise I will come and strike the land with a curse.”

All citizens, and especially the entire community of believers should be in the face of their legislators about this law.    Instead of further corrosion of marriage and family, we can insist that faultless divorce be by mutual consent only, and that consequences be restored for destructive behavior that seriously undermines the integrity of the marriage.   As a constitutional matter, we should be demanding that only  under such proven circumstances may a government entity intrude itself into a marriage.

7 Times Around the Jericho Wall | Let’s Repeal No-Fault Divorce

– by standerinfamilycourt.com

 

 

 

 

Another Honey Maid Whitewash

I’ve been struggling for days over just what to say about this Honey Maid commercial recently shared by the Coalition for Divorce Reform on their facebook page:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8hOC7H32W20&feature=youtu.be.   I truly didn’t want to sound mean, but silence is not appropriate either, it seems.   Many Christians, even, have been given horrible and unbiblical counsel over many years by their pastors, who in turn were just following the official position of their Protestant denomination, whose leadership most likely sold out in the 1970’s to the tide of “no-fault” divorce sweeping the nation at the time.   Those denominational leaders felt compelled to make their position on divorce and remarriage more “relevant”  so as to head off the loss of membership and finances.    Never mind that Jesus was very clear about His views on “blended families” that don’t result solely from widowhood:   (Luke 16:18) “Everyone who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery, and he who marries one who is divorced from a husband commits adultery.”

During the last Super Bowl, I believe it was Honey Maid whose similar schmaltz-offering likewise extolled homosexual parenting as though the ample evidence of toxicity in those arrangements wasn’t plainly manifest in news articles about pedophilia and child molestation in those homes,  or in the wistfully dysfunctional accounts of young adults who have been raised in lesbian homes, many of which were established in the aftermath of a heterosexual divorce – a situation that is increasingly common.    Of course, there was conveniently no mention of the results of a 20-year longitudinal study published by the University of Texas in 2012 that  showed the poor wide-ranging outcomes of every kind of childrearing arrangement vs. an intact, married heterosexual family (i.e. God’s model, eloquently described by Jesus in Matthew 19:4-6).

In this latest installment, the toxic outcomes of living out a culture of adulterous remarriage are likewise swept aside in a glisteningly sentimental display of affirmation.   Nowhere is the precipitously higher failure rate of second, third and fourth marriages mentioned.   Nowhere is it mentioned that spouse #2 might just be of the same gender these days.    Nowhere is there mention of the higher rate of teen pregnancy, substance abuse, same-sex attraction, suicide attempts / completions, or next generation marriage failure among the children of these “blended” families.    Nowhere is the high suicide rate among divorced, even remarried men such as Robin Williams mentioned.   Not broken, they say!

Why is it not OK to be broken and just admit it, Honey Maid?    King David, the ultimate “blended family” guy, showed us in Psalms 32 and 51 that the sort of brokenness that brings us to our knees, in sacrifice of our preference to just feel good, is actually the beginning of true wholeness.

7 Times Around the Jericho Wall  / Let’s Repeal No-Fault Divorce

– by standerinfamilycourt.com

 

 

So WHAT IF We Couldn’t Get Divorced?

In response to the blogger on yahoo! Aug. 21, 2014……

I think what’s really being asked is, what if one spouse could no longer unilaterally divorce the other spouse without cause (and without economic consequence) simply because modern civil government believes the spouse who wants out  “deserves to be happy”?      Divorce against God’s will goes all the way back to Moses – at least, and such all-or-nothing debate seems a bit pointless.    It would actually take far less than an all-out divorce ban to radically improve our nation’s security and prosperity.

Perhaps a more productive question is: “What if uncontested, mutual-consent divorce became the only ‘faultless’ divorce available?”

Here’s my take on that:

1) Basic Constitutional rights would be restored to the “Respondent” for the first time in 40 years in some states.

2) God’s hand of blessing would return to the United States after His long season of withdrawing Divine protection from prolonged political, social and economic hard times.

3)   The suicide rate for men and teens would decline precipitously.

4) Substance abuse and abortion rates would decline precipitously .

5)  People would see more of their pastors and counselors, and would take their advice more seriously.

6) The poverty rate would decline sharply and government budgets would be balanced again without raising taxes.

7) The homosexuality rate, particularly rebound lesbianism, would decline.

8) Pornography use would decline.

9)  Individual couples would retire substantially wealthier.

10) In time, we’d see an end to mass shootings in public places like day care centers, schools, malls and places of employment.

 

7 Times Around the Jericho Wall | Let’s Repeal No-Fault Divorce

– standerinfamilycourt.com

 

 

 

Let's Repeal No-Fault Divorce!